dandelion goblin
@dandelionqueer
Woodworker, dad, and gardener in Minneapolis. Part wildflower, part bear, all trouble 😈🏳️⚧️
Sometimes you have a small meltdown and then you get high and your husband makes you charcutch for dinner.
Someone in this house, not naming names, just took a piece of coal out of the grill and tried to eat it. Such a himbo.
I’m chilling on the couch finishing lunch in between sessions, thank god at home instead of at my office, and I hear an absolute RACKET from hens the yard. Girlie swooped my head three times going to different trees while I herded the chickens into the coop. I’ve never been so close to one before 😍😍
2 out of 3 cats approve of the new incredibly cheap/cheaply made cat tree we purchased. The third cat could not be reached for comment
Robert had some heinous diarrhea last night and was asking to go outside every half hour until about 2am. My adderall is NOT cutting it today. 😭
Got home to work and flat out panicked for a while. Turns out one of the chickens ripped off a toenail. Cleaned it up, she’s fine, but WOW. This wasn’t even all of it. (Pictures are of a raised garden bed where it looks like a small child was murdered).
I…I think I need to ask my partner if he’s okay with me participating in spicy chess. We haven’t really negotiated that.
Despite having a fully enclosed, snow free run, the chickens will not leave the coop this morning. They’re giving “we thought we were done with this. If this is how it’s gonna be, we would rather starve.”
Regardless of how much snow it is exactly, it is Robert approved.
I got home from walking the dogs and discovered Lando had picked up a SPECIAL SOUVENIR and carried it all the way home—the world’s oldest driest squirrel carcass. I took him out to the alley and offered him treats in exchange for leaving it and he willingly obliged. He’s very proud of himself.
Editor: You get that strawberry boba lid design finished? Graphic designer: Sure did boss, real fuckin sexy just like you asked. Editor: what
What do you mean the snow is going to melt by the end of the day? Say it ain’t so.
The weird ass things we find ourselves grieving. She hated snow, pretty much. She was a hot weather dog. But she could enjoy a new snow, when she was younger. She hated coats and boots until she got outside and then she was fine. She was incredibly dramatic about it all.
This is the first snowfall in over a decade that I won’t need to shovel a special extra area for Bowser to pee on (since she was so short that she couldn’t pee comfortable if the snow was more than about 3 inches).
To say that Lando enjoyed his walk today would be an understatement. It would not be an understatement to say that he walked through the deepest/dirtiest part of ever puddle we saw.
Not only is he correct about the luge but gosh I appreciate that in the 1980s Robin Williams could make gay jokes as a straight man which were legit funny and not punching down. Some comedians should take a fucking seat. (I miss him)
Bowser used to howl me awake between 4&5 so that she could pee (or so I could tuck her back in to her heated blanket after she peed on a pee pad). I would tuck her in, give her some pets and smooches, and then go back to sleep. My brain hates me so I’ve woken up all week, stuck awake and sad.
2012-2026. There will never be a more beloved, sassy, spoiled basset hound. Our home is so empty without her in it.
This is the middle of a romance movie that is so disgusting I would stab my own eyes out instead of watch it.
Why yes, I did just tell my collie he was gonna get frostbite. This is his “dad’s full of shit” face.
Robert is keeping an eye out for any shenanigans in the backyard.
I’m so fucking glad I have a dog who wants to sit in my lap because there is nothing quite so comforting at this moment in my life. (The lap dog in question, earlier today).