David Bamford

@davidbamford

He/Him. Glasgow. Queer. Writer. Con-goer and -runner. Eastercon co-chair 2027. Horror, SF/F, queer culture, punk/sludge/hardcore/doom metal, kittens. Conservatives/bots/TERFs/nazis/arseholes need not follow. #ThePhobiaFiles is at davidbamford.me

493 Folgt819 Follower699 Posts

Bluesky

gay

Ist das dein Profil?Übernimm es — dann gehört dir davidbamford.dirty.social.Profil übernehmen

David Bamford@davidbamford· 15d

Watched IN A VIOLENT NATURE a couple of nights ago. @davidgreenwriter.bsky.social if you haven’t seen it, this thing is incredibly Friday The 13th-coded. Brutally violent, stupidly funny and the scenery and diegetic sound are honestly beautiful. Loved it.

Movie poster for IN A VIOLENT NATURE, showing a masked killer wielding a hook.

David Bamford@davidbamford· 29d

This is probably the most niche joke I’ve ever made. Major props to you if you get it.

A black t-shirt design for the band Deerhoof featuring the midnight dinner scene from the film Goodfellas, in which Joe Pesci asks to borrow a carving knife to cut a deer’s hoof out of his car grille

David Bamford@davidbamford· Jul 12

@octothorpecast.bsky.social We live just off Great Western Road in Glasgow so we are absolutely not short of wanky coffee places near us - which reminded me of this Modern Toss cartoon:

A yellow greeting card and blue envelope. On the card is a drawing of 2 men on a high street, with several coffee shops around them. One man is saying to the other, ‘Excuse me, is there anywhere round here I can’t get a coffee?’

David Bamford@davidbamford· Feb 26

Also watched Shinya Tsukamoto’s 1989 film TETSUO: THE IRON MAN last night, again for the first time since I was 19 and trying to be edgy. Bonkers. Bizarre. Brilliant. The very thinnest concept of a plot, so little dialogue you almost don’t even need subtitles, and jaw-dropping special effects.

Movie poster for TETSUO: THE IRON MAN (1989) - a man’s face, blue-tinged, faces left, surrounded by metal cogs

David Bamford@davidbamford· Feb 26

Watched Neil Marshall’s excellent 2005 cave-horror movie THE DESCENT last night for the first time in probably 20 years. Forgot just how effective it is - the scares scare, the practical effects are brilliant (broken shin bone moment anyone?) and it’s claustrophobic as all hell.

Movie poster for THE DESCENT (2005). A black background has a thin, blue, misty-looking line leads down to a woman’s face, looking to camera.

David Bamford@davidbamford· Jan 19

TW: spiders. I watched POSSUM last night for the first time. What a movie. Can’t stop thinking about it. At once absolutely terrifying and horribly sad. Actually screamed at one point. It’s outstanding.

Image of the poster for POSSUM: it shows a spider crawling out of a doctor’s type bag on a bed.

David Bamford@davidbamford· Dec 23

My essay THE ROOM YOU MUST NOT ENTER got actually published in a real live book entitled DARKEST MARGINS and now I am having a small meltdown thank you bye

The book DARKEST MARGINS rests on a wooden table, along with swatches of fabric worn on-screen by Lady Gaga in AHS: HOTEL.

The front page of my essay THE ROOM YOU MUST NOT ENTER, examining queer representation in AHS: HOTEL and DAHMER

David Bamford@davidbamford· Oct 30

Hope everyone has a great time at World FantasyCon! Sadly we won’t be there but please enjoy this picture I took of the sky in Glasgow this morning:

Sunrise feat. an orange/dark blue sky, against which are silhouetted two church spires

David Bamford@davidbamford· Oct 19

Currently reading, among other things, THE GONE-AWAY WORLD by @nickharkaway.com - a book which I described to a friend as being like if China Miéville and Dylan Thomas wrote a book together set in a post-apocalyptic North of England. It’s big, it’s staggeringly smart, and it’s laugh-out-loud funny.

Cover of THE GONE-AWAY WORLD by Nick Harkaway, featuring white text (The Gone-Away World) above a red paint splatter in more or less a straight line bisecting the cover, beneath which the author’s name is written, again in white. The background is black.

David Bamford@davidbamford· Oct 16

It is #NationalCatDay! Lemme see them cats! 🐈‍⬛ this is George 🐾

George, a black and white cat, on a laminate floor.

David Bamford@davidbamford· Sep 2

If anyone here is already thinking about #Shocktober - here’s my current list. Enjoy! 🍁🎃👻

David Bamford@davidbamford· Aug 14

Went to see WEAPONS last night. Amy Madigan is an unhinged revelation. Julia Garner is sublime. Benedict Wong is perfect. Josh Brolin plays the grieving father role with a rare kind of conviction. The whole thing is a sort of insane delight. Not perfect, but close.

Against a dark blue-grey nighttime background, several silhouetted children run away from camera, their arms outstretched at their sides. Beneath the children, the word WEAPONS is in bright red capital letters.

David Bamford@davidbamford· Jul 31

The Phobia Files - SPIDERS is live! Alive, and skittering across your eyeballs… davidbamford.me/2025/07/31/S...

A dark red background, on which black text reads SPIDERS.

David Bamford@davidbamford· Jul 16

TRIGGER WARNING FOR ATTACHED PHOTO - SPIDER Ready for more from #ThePhobiaFiles? Something is coming… 31.07 What are you afraid of?

Black and white still from the video game LIMBO. A small child stands, facing to the right of the screen, on a platform over some water and a slight drop. Meanwhile, unbeknownst to him, a HUGE spider is crawling towards him from behind.

David Bamford@davidbamford· Jul 2

You too can consider the wet smack of flesh hitting concrete from a starting point hundreds (thousands?) of feet up by reading HEIGHTS, the first instalment of my new horror blog #ThePhobiaFiles at the link in my bio. What are you afraid of?

On a red background, black type reads ‘The Phobia Files’

David Bamford@davidbamford· Jul 1

#ThePhobiaFiles launched yesterday and the first instalment has already had some great feedback. Check it out at davidbamford.me - new writing coming on the last day of every month!

On a red background, the word HEIGHTS. is written in black type.

David Bamford@davidbamford· Jun 29

Hey @tammylc.bsky.social - got a set of four of these for Christmas, had the first one (Gordon’s pink gin) last night and tbh it was pretty gross. Don’t suppose you do a ‘What We’re Rage-Drinking This Week’ segment on the podcast do you? (Obviously joking about this but it was still gross)

Three tiny bottles of pink gin/gin liqueur from (l-r) Whitley Neill, Greenalls and Edinburgh Gin.

David Bamford@davidbamford· Jun 5

Want a sneak peek at the first entry in #ThePhobiaFiles? Comment below with your greatest fear! 🏙️🏙️🏙️

On a red background, black text reads #ThePhobiaFiles coming 2025, what are you afraid of?

David Bamford@davidbamford· May 27

@andybitesdog.bsky.social have you seen this? Wanna go?

Lineup for Core. Festival in Glasgow this year.

David Bamford@davidbamford· May 12

Doing a few at once: Teens insufficiently killed a guy Maybe don’t watch the video Shoulda stuck to the map Whatever, I’ve got another foot Inaccurately remembered Friday The 13th

Green background with skeleton beneath with raised arms. Caption reads ‘Describe a horror movie in 5 words or less and let’s see who can guess what it is’.

David Bamford@davidbamford· May 3

‘I thought to enter the room, I could have slipped through the door, I felt the burden of murder, it shook the earth to the core. Felt like the world was collapsing - then we heard him speak: “Can I still get into heaven if I kill myself?”’

The Sound of Music's Sister Maria regales the Von Trapp children with an acoustic guitar rendition of La Dispute’s King Park on an Austrian mountaintop

David Bamford@davidbamford· Apr 23

Really in the mood for some big, sprawling epic fantasy so have picked THE GRACE OF KINGS by Ken Liu. Perfect (I hope) for losing myself in on a long haul flight.

Cover of THE GRACE OF KINGS by Ken Liu, showing a metal armour helmet with a dandelion on top of it against a black background

David Bamford@davidbamford· Mar 28

You: Powers restored! *haircut selfie* Me: Powers restored!

Cover of the new Deafheaven album LONELY PEOPLE WITH POWER, featuring a lady leaning in the window of a red car, in which a child sits.

David Bamford@davidbamford· Mar 27

Pete Hesgeth as one of The Plastics in MEAN GIRLS (2004) in a car with Amanda Seyfried and Lacey Chabert, the caption reads ‘get in loser we’re bombing Yemen’

David Bamford@davidbamford· Mar 25

Me in the national security group chat:

Alexis Mateo on RuPaul’s Drag Race mid-argument, saying ‘Act the fool, girl. Act the fool.’

David Bamford@davidbamford· Mar 21

‘iya. What’s happening this weekend? Lego building, emails to send, holiday planning. Oh and this is my face. In case you forgot. Have a good one!

A man with a beard (me) in a green t-shirt looking at the camera. I have a visible tattoo on my right arm. My shirt is kind of crumpled and the walls of the room are painted green. There is a painting on the wall of a man fishing surrounded by greenery.

David Bamford@davidbamford· Mar 20

Alt text contains spoilers for the movie AUDITION, but given it came out 26 years ago, if you were gonna watch it you’d probably have done so by now.

Image of the villain from the movie AUDITION, a Japanese women called Asami. She has long black hair and is wearing a black and white shirt and long black gloves and holds a length of piano wire. The title of the movie FOOTLOOSE is emblazoned over the image.

SPOILERS FOR AUDITION BELOW

In Audition, the climax of the movie comes when Asami cuts a man’s foot off with piano wire.

David Bamford@davidbamford· Mar 18

Started HIGH-RISE INVASION last night. If you want a show which is essentially THE RAID meets BATTLE ROYALE you’ve come to the right place.

3 people on top of a skyscraper, on the left a man in a mask smokes a cigarette while holding a machine gun, in the middle a man holds a sledgehammer across his own shoulders and on the right a young girl stands looking at the masked man.

David Bamford@davidbamford· Mar 16

Next up is THE QUEEN by Nick Cutter. This man’s work is reliably disgusting, body horror-focused and breakneck paced. If you’ve slept on him so far, wake up. Start with THE TROOP. #booksky #nickcutter #thequeen #horror

Cover of THE QUEEN by Nick Cutter, showing a woman’s face with a wasp on her cheek.

David Bamford@davidbamford· Mar 12

A photo you’d use as an album cover