Jed Hartman

@elysdir

Editor, writer, generalist, logophile, paronomasiac, ludophile. Bi, poly. He/him. Most of my posts here are abbreviated copies of things I’ve posted elsewhere.

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Ist das dein Profil?Übernimm es — dann gehört dir elysdir.dirty.social.Profil übernehmen

Jed Hartman@elysdir· Jun 23

Bougainvillea and lemon tree in my backyard.

Jed Hartman@elysdir· Jun 23

A photo of a Safeway grocery-store receipt (with location information redacted), at the bottom of which is this text:

YOUR CASHIER TODAY WAS SELF

Jed Hartman@elysdir· Jun 2

Comic panel in which a cartoon five-pointed-star says “Confidence is great, but correct information is better.”

At the bottom of the panel, a light-colored cartoon-person head says “Good point” and a darker-colored cartoon-person head says “True true.”

Jed Hartman@elysdir· Apr 8

Great offer for savings on an Ioniq 6 electric car!

Screen snap of text from a page on the Ioniq website, saying:

Save up to
$0
with potential credits and incentives

You can also save up to $0 per month on fuel. Find out how much more you can save based on where you live and how you drive.

Jed Hartman@elysdir· Apr 3

Nice! (Here’s a version with Alt text.)

Document formatted like one of the Trump administration’s legal memos. It says:

(Slip Opinion)

Constitutionality of the [Insert Inconvenient Law]

The [insert inconvenient law] is unconstitutional because it [insert legalistic description of inconvenience, making sure to emphasize the unity / autonomy / independence of Executive].

Memorandum Opinion for the Counsel to the President

You have asked whether the [insert inconvenient law] is constitutional. We conclude that it is not. Of course it is not, because you would rather it not be. And saying that it is constitutional would be inconvenient for you. Therefore, the [insert inconvenient law] is not constitutional.

Jed Hartman@elysdir· Mar 24

Alt text added.

An Apple AI summary (with some text elided) that says:

12:19 PM

[Smiley face emoji] Bad news; someone got sick; trivia crew notified; clown event still possible

Jed Hartman@elysdir· Mar 22

Hand-written sign at bookstore:

Tired of Human Men? Try Something Different!

(On a wall, surrounded by books on display like _I Think I’m in Love with an Alien_ (Ann Aguirre), _Filthy Rich Vampire_ (Geneva Lee), _Between Two Kings_ (Lindsay Straube), _Voidwalker_ (S. A. Maclean), _My Roommate Is a Vampire_ (Jenna Levine), and _Twilight_ (Stephenie Meyer).)

Jed Hartman@elysdir· Jun 26

With alt text.

11 minutes ago

Theodore Schleifer

As donors try to assess their next moves in the mayoral race, one of the biggest donors to Andrew Cuomo's super PAC, the investor Mark Gorton, said he is likely to back Mamdani. That is because of the support that Mamdani had gotten from Brad Lander, who Gorton said he ranked first. "I feel like people misunderstood my $250,000 for Cuomo for real enthusiasm," Gorton said in an interview. "It was basically, 'Oh, looks like Cuomo is coming back. We don't want to be shut out. Let's try and get on his good side.’ That's kind of how things work with Cuomo. It's sad political pragmatism. I wish we lived in a world where those sort of things were not useful things to do."

Jed Hartman@elysdir· Apr 11

I took this photo around midnight the night before last.

Lovely feathery clouds spread out across the dark sky, with the moon (looking small) shining brightly through one of them.

Jed Hartman@elysdir· Mar 2

There’s an iOS app, Seek, that identifies plant and animal species. Yesterday I took the dog I’m petsitting for a walk, and I was using Seek to identify plants. And then I moved the camera and it happened to point at said dog. And Seek obligingly identified his species… …as “Domestic Cat.”

A black-furred dog, viewed from above and behind and to the right, which the Seek app has identified as belonging to the species “Domestic Cat.”

Jed Hartman@elysdir· Mar 2

A sign (presumably advertising a store of some kind) that says:

FLOWERS
PRODUCE
EGGS

…To which the meme creator has added text that says:

NO,
THEY DO NOT.

Jed Hartman@elysdir· Jan 18

From _Mighty Avengers_ #10 (2014). After the death of Uatu (aka The Watcher), Adam Brashear (aka Blue Marvel) is called to the Moon by Uatu’s spouse, Ulana, to meet Uatu’s and Ulana’s as-yet-unborn baby.

In an alien building on the moon, Dr. Adam Brashear (a Black human with greying hair, dressed in a black suit) and Ulana (of the Watcher species, dressed in a flowing dress) observe Uatu’s and Ulana’s as-yet-unborn child (appearing as a giant floating head surrounded by light). The following dialogue ensues:

Brashear: It’s beautiful. Is it, ah… is it a *boy* or a *girl*?

Ulana: The child must watch *itself* to learn that.

(Credits for the issue: Al Ewing, writer; Greg Land, penciler; Jay Leisten, inker; Frank D’Armata, colorist; VC’s Cory Petit, letterer.)

Jed Hartman@elysdir· Dec 5

Yay! Have now purchased from Apple Books; looking forward to reading it. …But wanted to check: the cover as shown in Apple Books is just black text on a solid white background, no art. Is that intentional?

A screen snap of an artless book cover in the Apple Books store.

Jed Hartman@elysdir· Oct 29

Monolith and child