E.M. Faulds / Beth or Taxes / Not em faulds

@emfaulds

Award-winning Scottish science fiction & fantasy writer. Podcastle, Strange Horizons, Shoreline of Infinity, ParSec, Best of British SF. More: emfaulds.com NEW HANDLE, bethkesh will still work. #scruffyGarden Runs @bibliotta.bsky.social

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E.M. Faulds / Beth or Taxes / Not em faulds@emfaulds· 28d

Catering!

E.M. Faulds / Beth or Taxes / Not em faulds@emfaulds· 28d

At the launch for @rhiannonagrist.bsky.social and @neilwilliamson.bsky.social event talking about their books!

Authors in a bookshop, left to right, Neil Williamson, Rhianno Grist, and their interviewer, Rebecca Wojturska.

E.M. Faulds / Beth or Taxes / Not em faulds@emfaulds· 28d

Digestif: The Sky Has No Net Flavour profile: efficiency Pairs well with: the bill for your meal /20

Text excerpt from E.M. Faulds' collection "These Broken Little Worlds", story "The Sky Has No Net". Text reads: "They thought the first machine mind might be cruel, decide that humanity was evil and must be wiped out. Later, they learned this was what is called ‘projection’."

E.M. Faulds / Beth or Taxes / Not em faulds@emfaulds· 28d

Pudding: Heavy, Heavy Down Flavour profile: curry and lager with a side of emotion Pairs well with: farewells /19

Text excerpt from E.M. Faulds' collection "These Broken Little Worlds", story "Heavy, Heavy Down". Text reads: '“Ten days,” I said and watched Linda from HR’s face go through the calculations, come to the conclusion, and shift gears from professional hardcase to the image of sorrow. Ten days off work without further explanation could only mean one thing – funeral leave.'

E.M. Faulds / Beth or Taxes / Not em faulds@emfaulds· 28d

Dessert: Land Flavour profile: leaf litter, fresh sap, and desiccated bats Pairs well with: unfamiliar ground /18

Text excerpt from E.M. Faulds' collection "These Broken Little Worlds", story "Land". Text reads: "They say that Land slides and drifts in the same way a sargassum mat floats across the endless seas; that Land is a brief solid and that its natural form is liquid, hot, restless. All that motion is hard for me to hold inside my head and I am not sure what they measure it against. If Land is slipping around like a loose hide, why can I not feel it?"

E.M. Faulds / Beth or Taxes / Not em faulds@emfaulds· 28d

Dessert: Elphbats Flavour profile: linoleum and vintage suitcases Pairs well with: extremely local wildlife in your area /17

Text excerpt from E.M. Faulds' collection "These Broken Little Worlds", story "Elphbats". Text reads: "Elliot’s screams pierce through despite my efforts to block my ears up, plug them with cotton balls, press my hands hard over them. Then, just as my exhausted brain starts to tune it out, the damn thing changes. He begins to cry. He now sounds like a baby in distress. Or a soul in agony. A sound calculated to set my teeth constantly on edge, to send a surge of instinctive adrenaline into my core. I get out of bed and go out onto the porch to bang the tin roof with a broomstick, hoping to shut the thing up. And for a second, I think I’ve done it. Then, he fills up his lungs and blares even louder."

E.M. Faulds / Beth or Taxes / Not em faulds@emfaulds· 28d

Kid's menu: CAT-88 Flavour profile: all the best parts of the late eighties! Pairs well with: video games and meccano on hard level /16

Text excerpt from E.M. Faulds' collection "These Broken Little Worlds", story "CAT-88". Text reads: "Cathy started to sob. She hadn’t wanted this. The doctor had called it an ‘eye brace’ and talked about video games to correct her lazy eye. It had all sounded so easy and cool. But the huge lens over her wonky eye was wired via the ‘tiny little nick’ the doctor had cut in it. This then connected to a cradle system that had padded bolts screwed in until they had firm contact with her head to ‘stabilise the rig’. It felt as if her skull was being crushed."

E.M. Faulds / Beth or Taxes / Not em faulds@emfaulds· 28d

Dessert: The World is What You Make of It Flavour profile: floral with a pervasive note of sweat Pairs well with: hazmat suits and sturdy running shoes /15

Text excerpt from E.M. Faulds' collection "These Broken Little Worlds", story "The World is What You Make of It". Text reads: "In the Before Times, this had been just some pretty but insignificant bauble, not a piece in the puzzle that was resurrecting a planet. The pink had almost gone from the petals, faded under unknown years, but there was a ghost of a blush faintly visible as she took the dome of epoxy in gloved fingers. She lifted it up to the light from the broken bay window. God, it was perfect. And now she had to break it."

E.M. Faulds / Beth or Taxes / Not em faulds@emfaulds· 28d

Cheese board: Better Blood Flavour profile: slightly gamey with gold foil flecks Pairs well with: cream and red wine /14

Text excerpt from E.M. Faulds' collection "These Broken Little Worlds", story "Better Blood". Text reads: "First, I cut a slice only wide as me thumbnail. But it’s been a while since I pared ’em back, all dirty and long they are now, so I et more of this cheese than I should. And oh, it tasted good going down. Better than pork fat jelly. Better than a feast. I can’t eat it all at once, though. If I do, there will be none more. Maybe not ever."

E.M. Faulds / Beth or Taxes / Not em faulds@emfaulds· 28d

Hot beverage: A Flight of Birds Flavour profile: late night coffee and blood Pairs well with: aloe vera and crushes /13

Text excerpt from E.M. Faulds' collection "These Broken Little Worlds", story "A Flight of Birds". Text reads: "I’m hungry. How long are you supposed to leave it between feedings, anyway? The question floats above my head every now and then; a scribbly little black cartoon cloud with lightning bolts and knives stabbing out of it. For a cloud, it’s heavy. It stands up against the fug of the coffee house as the espresso machine gently farts and hisses disapprovingly at my side. I’m hungry. But, more importantly, Jimmy’s late."

E.M. Faulds / Beth or Taxes / Not em faulds@emfaulds· 28d

Cheese board: All the Way to the Dead Dog Party Flavour profile: the real ale bar at a convention Pairs well with: horse skulls with googly eyes /12

Text excerpt from E.M. Faulds' collection "These Broken Little Worlds", story "All the Way to the Dead Dog Party". Text reads: '“You supposed to be a thistle?” the tall man – probably in his late fifties, and probably very convention-jaded – asked.
Burryman realised he was sighing again. “No, I am the Burry Man, a traditional folkloric figure of the South Queensferry region of Scotland,” he recited, trying to keep the chagrin out of his voice. At least ‘thistle’ was closer than ‘Doctor Who monster’.'

E.M. Faulds / Beth or Taxes / Not em faulds@emfaulds· 28d

Main: Pearl and the World Flavour profile: a sprinkling of space dust on enough guilt to eat you alive Pairs well with: the end of the world, as far as you're concerned /11

Text excerpt from E.M. Faulds' collection "These Broken Little Worlds", story "Pear and the World". Text reads: "Inside the FTL pod, a house-sized thing with a basement full of tech, we sit in the living area. A cushiony sofa, gingham-homely, a small dispenser for food and drink, a corridor that leads to my bedroom and bathroom, a sad exercise bike. It smells of warmed plastic and maple syrup; it feels tiny and lived-in; it is surrounded by the interminable death threat of space.
I tell him the truth: he’s a simulogram and millions of miles from home."

E.M. Faulds / Beth or Taxes / Not em faulds@emfaulds· 28d

Main: The Raiment of Youth Flavour profile: notes of leather and crepe Pairs well with: self-delusion /10

Text excerpt from E.M. Faulds' collection "These Broken Little Worlds", story "The Raiment of Youth". Text reads: "You shed your skin, same as every year. It lies in a puddle on the floor around your ankles. You peel it off your toes and pick it up to put in the closet along with all your previous years."

E.M. Faulds / Beth or Taxes / Not em faulds@emfaulds· 28d

Main: Terrible Lizard Flavour profile: scales, red meat, and petrol Pairs well with: Godzilla as a Young Man Named Mike /9

Text excerpt from E.M. Faulds' collection "These Broken Little Worlds", story "Terrible Lizard". Text reads: "Fossey’s dog just sits there. I see him in the rearview, at the foot of my driveway looking stupid, like someone dumped a load of dirty carpet offcuts and it grew a tongue. And how dare a mutt obstruct the King of the Lizards, the Tyrant Who Shakes the Earth? My scaly, clawed hands clench around the steering wheel, twist it in frustration."

E.M. Faulds / Beth or Taxes / Not em faulds@emfaulds· 28d

Seafood course: Skelp Flavour profile: blubber and sea wrack Pairs well with: a slap around the face with a wet flipper /8

Text excerpt from E.M. Faulds' collection "These Broken Little Worlds", story "Skelp". Text reads: "It all came to pass when Thomas Relant, himself the son of a sealwife and a man, was forced to steal a wife of his own."

E.M. Faulds / Beth or Taxes / Not em faulds@emfaulds· 28d

Vegetarian option: Dreams Itself Awake Flavour profile: solar flares and metal Pairs well with: broken WiFi and long-suffering partners /7

Text excerpt from E.M. Faulds' collection "These Broken Little Worlds", story "Dreams Itself Awake". Text reads: "The dead AI servo inside his knee ached something chronic this morning. Case rubbed his leg as he sat on the back court’s meagre patio, a useless habit, nerves still screamed at him anyway. The garden chair’s decaying plastic powdered onto the arse of his jeans as he writhed into a better position, but relief was elusive however he folded himself."

E.M. Faulds / Beth or Taxes / Not em faulds@emfaulds· 28d

From the grill: Hand of Fire Flavour profile: the void without and within Pairs well with: old baggage and new friends /6

Text excerpt from E.M. Faulds' collection "These Broken Little Worlds", story "Hand of Fire". Text reads: "I shove my hands in pockets hidden among the ever-moving dark tendrils of my regalia and lean over Sergey, face visible through a small window on the coffin lid. His mouth curls down, as if closing his eyes in the midst of terrifying a subordinate. The Spartanix uniform collar juts up in sharp lines to the folds of his neck. His iron-grey hair is perfectly frosted. It’s a porthole with a view of submerged icebergs, sleeping kraken that might stir at any minute, but he can’t hurt anyone any more."

E.M. Faulds / Beth or Taxes / Not em faulds@emfaulds· 28d

Soup course: "Broken Blue" Flavour profile: mysterious with a hint of oak leaves after the rain Pairs well with: owning an elderly labrador /5

Text excerpt from E.M. Faulds' collection "These Broken Little Worlds", story "Broken Blue". Text reads: '“I’ll go when the dog goes,” Rowan says.
Katie’s smile stiffens. What?'

E.M. Faulds / Beth or Taxes / Not em faulds@emfaulds· 28d

Appetizer: "Love, Scotland" Flavour profile: warm, with hints of existential terror Pairs well with: mushrooms and rare elements /4

Text excerpt from E.M. Faulds' collection "These Broken Little Worlds", story "Love, Scotland". Text reads: "They’d stopped to put on the full protection gear before they even got close: waders, rain gear, full facemasks nestled snug under a hood. It was a sweat-inducing heatwave inside the suit, but necessary. Acids, toxic leaching, even the mushrooms were not to be touched without some sort of protection. Meera had pulled on layer after layer, picked up the canvas sack that she was to fill with their harvest."

E.M. Faulds / Beth or Taxes / Not em faulds@emfaulds· 28d

Appetizer: "Godzilla as a Young Man Named Mike" Flavour profile: notes of charred wallpaper followed by a stroll on the beach Pairs well with: saltwater and rage /3

Text excerpt from E.M. Faulds' collection "These Broken Little Worlds", story "Godzilla as a Young Man Named Mike" Text reads: "You broke out at lunchtimes to avoid the rec area. When your legs were good, you’d wander down to the canal where there weren’t as many pedestrians. Discarded cartons and plastic bottles floated in scum down there, but it was quiet. You once confessed you had the weird urge to get in, do laps between the lock gates. It looked like it would poison you with chemicals, was filled with empty shopping carts and smelled like rotten eggs, but still, you wanted to get in."

E.M. Faulds / Beth or Taxes / Not em faulds@emfaulds· 28d

It tickles me to think of the table of contents in collection like a menu at a fancy-schmancy restaurant, so here we go! Aperitif: "The Last Sign". Flavour profile: being chased through history by jackboots Pair with: cherry lip gloss from a traitor's kiss and a thousand-yard stare. /2

Text excerpt from E.M. Faulds' collection "These Broken Little Worlds", story "The Last Sign". Text reads "First were words, from lips to ear. We whispered our pacts quietly in lines at the bus stop, huddled round late-night kitchen tables, circumstantially sat on the same park bench. But those we resisted lined up behind us, put glasses to the wall, lurked in the long grass, listening."

E.M. Faulds / Beth or Taxes / Not em faulds@emfaulds· 28d

Shouting about my short story collection "These Broken Little Worlds" once more! A tasting menu of stories incoming... 🧵 (Publisher buying options: www.newconpress.co.uk/info/book.as... or Amazon if that's your thing: www.amazon.co.uk/These-Broken... ) /1

E.M. Faulds / Beth or Taxes / Not em faulds@emfaulds· Jul 7

It's a grey day in #scruffyGarden but a new friend has come out. The Dutch iris successfully hid from the predations of the squirrels for long enough!

Dutch iris with yellow and pale blue petals. Background is a blue plant pot nestled in greenery.

Close up of the long tongue of one of the yellow petals of a Dutch iris. Raindrops gather on it.

E.M. Faulds / Beth or Taxes / Not em faulds@emfaulds· Jul 6

A MASSIVE thank you to these folks who took time to give thoughtful reviews for my collection, "These Broken Little Worlds", on Goodreads! Notes like these are what keeps me writing 🤩 www.goodreads.com/book/show/25...

Goodreads review of "These Broken Little Worlds" by E.M. Faulds. User "Chrisp" says: "These are the kind of stories that make me want to join a book club just so I can spend time discussing each story and the ideas it brings up. So 5 stars because while some of the stories may hit harder than others, the least of them is enjoyable and most of them will stick with me long after the reading is done."

Goodreads review of "These Broken Little Worlds" by E.M. Faulds. User "Raj" says: "When I reviewed Faulds' last collection, Under the Moon, I called her a very talented writer who I expect to see much more of. Nothing I've seen of her since then, including this collection, has led me to change my mind. Very worth your time, and it gets bonus points from me for having so many stories set in Scotland."

E.M. Faulds / Beth or Taxes / Not em faulds@emfaulds· Jul 3

ah fuck they got calibre too

Calibre ebook software menu screenshot. The highlighted option is "discuss selected book(s) with AI"

E.M. Faulds / Beth or Taxes / Not em faulds@emfaulds· Jul 3

Looking up hotels for one night in Edinburgh. Not even during fringe. All of the listings are like £345 and this descriptor:

$Meme: Tumblr post by maverick-ornithography shows photograph taken (Flickr credit to pominoz68) featuring two Pelicans, one with its mouth widely open and text: “pelcan Mouth perfec t size for put baby in to n\ap! inside very Soft and Comfort baby sleep soundly put baby in Pelican Mouth. Put Baby In Pelican Mouth. no problems ever in peliccan mouth because good Shape and Support for baby neck weak of big baby head. Apelican Mouth yes a place for a baby put baby in pelican mouth can trust pelican for giveing good love to baby. friend pelican”$

E.M. Faulds / Beth or Taxes / Not em faulds@emfaulds· Jul 1

Morning from #scruffyGarden. The bedding plants are coming in lovely. I honestly don't remember if those daisies were in a seed packet last year. Either way, I'm enjoying the show!

Photo of a garden: foreground has flowering plants like lavender, fox-and-cubs, white daisies with yellow centres and yellow daisies. A glimpse of a lawn with golden buttercups, a shed with pink roses, a thick hedge beside it.

A view through white daisies into a garden filled with an abundance of green leafed trees.

E.M. Faulds / Beth or Taxes / Not em faulds@emfaulds· Jun 27

The gardener (Le Notre) wanted to make the 1.5 miles of garden seem shorter and give it a more"human scale", so everything would seem closer. At the far end, there's a statue of Hercules and the lawn here is far narrower than it is close to the house. The trees and lines force the perspective. /9

Looking up a lawn toward the golden statue of Hercules at the far end of the chateau gardens. Two lines of trees on either side narrow towards the top of a hill.

The formal gardens closer to the Vaux-le-Vicomte chateau. Much wider up here. Stone railings lead down some steps to a long gravel path, bounded by rectangles of lawn which contain some swirling silver pathways, a modern artwork. But the lines of every garden bed, path, and reflecting pool are gently narrowing. Trees and grass in the distance. Now imagine these lines not messed with, how far it would be.

E.M. Faulds / Beth or Taxes / Not em faulds@emfaulds· Jun 27

Anyway, the gardens are their own marvel. Reflecting pools everywhere. And believe it or not, they actually did a trompe l'oeil to make the damn thing look smaller, and flatter. /8

E.M. Faulds / Beth or Taxes / Not em faulds@emfaulds· Jun 27

THEY HAD A BERNINI. I cannot express how happy that made me. Dude had some friggin magic. How do you make marble even do that? /7