damn autocorrect

and our response on a government level is the guy who just now remembers he needs windshield wipers as it’s raining

then i looked it up because, y’know, it’s 🔥 season y’all.

i travel this state extensively. one day i thought, the sagebrush in these scablands is kindling, no fire prevention bands, etc, maybe we’re like ‘fuck it’ doesn’t matter if this land burns i guess 🤷🏼‍♂️

symmetry of the Belatrix

ok, first of all ladies, my wife is whimsy as hell and you cannot compete with this kind of love sitting in the cupboard

you gotta earn dad-neck

already went through my skywalker phase

grab a beer and a smoke, and take your dog for a walk. might be surprised by what you see

10 for 2, start cryin

you ever finally get into bed and just…

when you leave me alone by myself for a few days andi’ve ‘nothing to do’

laundry done

this picture caused/will cause in the next three days about twenty separate meetings among five different companies, and probably save many a life and limb in the future.

feels like butterscotch too

aw fuck, here we go

i don’t mean to brag, but my wife of 32 years kisses me on the mouth

i am requesting at this time that no one follow or unfollow me for as long as they can control themselves

trixxie says ‘sup

unrelated: department of education goes back to “fetal position under your desk” drills

this is $58 worth of chicken now

trixie’s guarding the tomatoes, we’re gonna be ok

fkn epic

this nfl scoring summary is inspiring my next “dear playboy” letter

pretty sure i could live off of canned chili for three-maybe-three and a half years

it was a good summer

this is how we’re visiting family or i’m not going

just need me some newt scrotum for the rest of this spell

finally hitting my steampunk era