Matt Wieteska

@gamecat

Freelance Writer, Game Designer, Director. BAFTA Member. Previously: Writer @ Techland; Head of Production @ Six to Start; Creative Lead on Marvel Move; Voice Director & Radio Abel creator on Zombies, Run!

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Bluesky

gamer

Ist das dein Profil?Übernimm es — dann gehört dir gamecat.dirty.social.Profil übernehmen

Matt Wieteska@gamecat· 26d

Fellow bisexuals, hear me out: The Magic Faraway Tree has gifted us a brand new "The Mummy" power-couple, only this time their incredible competences are in "doing a Stardew Valley" instead of "doing an Indiana Jones", and they're both incredible softie parents. A dream couple for your 40s.

A picture of Claire Foy and Andrew Garfield in "The Magic Faraway Tree"

Matt Wieteska@gamecat· Jun 27

And with a cat lying on you? Peak.

Matt Wieteska@gamecat· May 28

sir another fifteen thousand anthems for Scotland at the world cup have been released

Matt Wieteska@gamecat· Feb 13

#AccidentalOnePiece

Matt Wieteska@gamecat· Jan 25

Seeing this top post on r/NFCEastMemeWar felt like a very targeted-to-me signal that this is absolutely breaking through

Matt Wieteska@gamecat· Dec 3

One Piece chapter 1137 spoilers

The cover of a "Ranger Rick Jr" magazine with a picture of a bison and the headline "hello Shaggy"

Matt Wieteska@gamecat· Jul 21

Being in this job market is hell.

Screenshot of the company information section of the job post, it reads:

"Braintrust is revolutionizing hiring with Braintrust AIR, the world's first and only end-to-end Al recruiting platform.

Trained with human insights and proprietary data, Braintrust AIR reduces time to hire from months to days, instantly matching you with pre-vetted qualified candidates, and conducting the first round phone screen for you. Trusted by hundreds of Fortune 1000 enterprises including Nestlé, Porsche, Atlassian, Goldman Sachs, and Nike, Braintrust AIR is making talent acquisition professionals 100x more effective and saving companies hundreds of thousands of dollars in recruiting costs."

Screenshot of the job summary from the listing, it reads:

"trying to find a good LLM approach to organize and summarize all the insights of 450 blog posts. it would be great if the solution organized the content into a new web page where the content was grouped/clustered by topic.

basically i cant read 400 blog posts but thinking if content is grouped into a new website easier to read it all"

Matt Wieteska@gamecat· Jul 9

Have discovered some of the most inexplicable colouring sheets in existence

Matt Wieteska@gamecat· Jul 6

Every industry, pointing at every other industry: they'll be safe from their bosses replacing them with AI! Every industry: *endless screaming*

A screenshot from the article linked in the quoted post, which reads:

So far, creative fields, and those that involve real-life human contact, seem more impervious to this trend. It will probably be a period of time before doctors or nurses, or professions that rely on genuine creativity such as painters or performing artists, find themselves replaced with an AI model. Even so, if people become increasingly unable to spot AI, and businesses continue to embrace it, the risk is that professions such as art and illustration also get devalued over time, and replaced by a bleak, AI-generated cocktail of eerily familiar "creative" work.

Matt Wieteska@gamecat· Jul 2

LinkedIn, today, after a full year of unemployment: "you might be suitable for (impersonating Only Fans creators in their discord DMs)”

Screenshot of a job posting, which reads:

About the job

We're hiring Remote Digital Chatters and we're looking specifically for people who grew up online, know how to match tone fast, and keep convos spicy, flirty, funny, or comforting based on the vibe.

You'll be managing text-based chats on behalf of top creators on an adult subscription platform. This is a behind-the-scenes role, and it's 100% text.

You'll Be Responsible For:

Messaging fans under a digital persona

Creating fun, flirty, emotionally charged conversations

Selling content naturally through engaging chat

Keeping fans interested and coming back for more

Ideal Background:

Gamers, streamers, roleplayers, Reddit/Twitter lurkers you get it

Comfortable shifting tone (from flirty to heartfelt to sarcastic)

Quick-witted and emotionally smart

Fluent in English, strong grammar, and fast typing

You need a PC or laptop and stable internet

What's in It for You:

Remote role with flexible shifts (8 hour shifts)

Commission-based with minimum guaranteed earnings

Weekly bonuses, monthly rewards

Zero face time - 100% text-based

If you've got rizz, humour, and keyboard charisma, you'll thrive here.

Matt Wieteska@gamecat· Apr 16

Book found on the table at an incredibly rural pub. I'm utterly against book burning but this is testing my patience... How the hell does this end up next to the discarded holiday reads? Trigger warnings aplenty on the blurb here: If in doubt, move on.

Matt Wieteska@gamecat· Apr 10

More like Blue Balls, amirite?

An image of the steam page for Blue Prince, a hotly anticipated game, showing it will release in "approximately less than an hour"

Matt Wieteska@gamecat· Feb 13

Puzzle designer life in two images: intended solution vs player solution

A maze from a kids' menu at pizza hut. A red line indicates the intended solution, which is circuitous and covers most of the maze.

A small maze from the kids' menu at Pizza Hut. A green crayon line shows the solution found by a child. It is incredibly short, and takes an almost perfectly straight path to the centre of the maze.

Matt Wieteska@gamecat· Jan 28

If you would have to charge £6k a ticket to pay your staff, you do not have a functional production, you have an attractive mask to put on wage theft.

Matt Wieteska@gamecat· Jan 25

🙏 thanks for the inspiration!

Matt Wieteska@gamecat· Sep 1

Crypto idiots out here sounding like a game of Mornington Crescent, but somehow even more insufferable.

Matt Wieteska@gamecat· Apr 18

IKEA pegboard with little clear buckets and clips for packets like in my pantry?

Matt Wieteska@gamecat· Mar 4

Part one of a poem: "On most occasions
By the time I'm properly
Aware I'm part of
The conversation

Everyone in it already hates me

Not in a major way
Just in a
Like
This would all be so much better for us
If you were a fundamentally different person
Way"

Part two of a poem: "You'd be jumpy too
And apologise too much
If every mundane interaction
Began with the shock
Of being kicked out of the back of a personnel carrier

And ended with the muffled confusion
Of people slowly giving up
on the effort of including you"

Part three of a poem: "These days
The words I hear clearest are
Never mind
It doesn't matter
Or some minor variation on that theme

Always about a second after
Three exclamation points laser their way
Into my attention

So I'm hanging vented
Hypnic-jerked
Into new-minted vacuum
And the anxious debris
Of whatever just ceased to be worth yelling at me about"

Part four of a poem: "Lonely doesn't cover it

It's a 30% life
I get 30% of the words, at best
A third of the ambient humanity

30% of the meaning
and the rest I make for myself
from replayed scraps and context clues

and the unshakable look
of disappointment
on my daughter's face
when she turns for someone else to talk to"

Matt Wieteska@gamecat· Sep 30

A screenshot of a poem, which reads:

A paper wasp takes weeks to build a nest
The guy in the Orioles hat on my FYP needs only thirty seconds of cap-cuts to bring it down for one eightieth of a penny per view

Unlived futures
Wisping down
In shreds
Below the caption
And the hashtags
And the auto-generated subtitles

It's my fault
He says, and zoom, sensing the moment, renders it in full caps MY FAULT
as the subsidiaries' logos in his virtual backdrop
Shiver
Remembering the days of their own
Surprise mandatory all-hands

Thirteen years of careful growth

Sheltered symbiotically under the second story eaves
Where the bark of local trees was plenty sufficient
And we kept the aphids at bay all summer

We were able to balance the acidity
Of our mastication perfectly
Just bitter enough
And the warmth of our bodies together
Vibrated a season into memory

Matt Wieteska@gamecat· Sep 4

Obsessed by how terrible this print on demand kids' book is. Random Wolfram Alpha output + mail merge. Completely tedious for everyone involved.