Stand down Uggs and Crocs. We have a winner.

Would you like a...

I think I'll skip church today.

A picture can paint a thousand words. Sometimes just one will do.

Want to feel old? This is what Rachel from Friends looks like now.

When you proudly prove you can wank and catch it in the other hand.

"Jenny Hanley? I haven't heard that name in years.”

Lewis Hamilton, there. Channeling the ghosts of Prince and 1970’s television reception.

“How did your first day at work go, Timothy?" "Not great…"

I so wish I could display this at work.

When you read a news item that includes “he posted on Truth Social”.

She cooked far too much of this for the kids. We'll be having words later!

A sign in Colchester city centre.

A lovely pic of a young Ed Sheeran and his mum.

When you're determined to let the world know you're a cock.

“Don’t worry, Dave, the ambulance will be here soon.”

Stick a pony in me pocket I'll fetch the suitcase from the van Cause if you want the best 'uns And you don't ask questions Then brother I'm your man Where it all comes from Is a mystery It's like the changing of the seasons And the tides of the sea...

No one loves a show off, mate.

This is how I’ll always remember him.

When you first try on your Summer clothes.

A bit creepy, Duolingo. Whichever way I choose to read it.

When a neighbour’s cooking bacon.

Nothing says ‘brave’ quite like choosing a new flavoured water.

How much do you love Jesus?

When you have to prove you’re over fifty.

When you decide ‘growing old gracefully’ isn’t for you.

If they don’t play classical music and serve real ale I’d want my money back.

Fucking foreigners, coming over here and saying something sensible!

"...and the second nun says - yes it does, doesn't it?".

Time flies…