Jordan Pickford

“Schwarber and Bryce HAVE TO be in the Home Run Derby!” Neither of them win. “Sanchez HAS TO start the All-Star Game! He got screwed last year!” Gives up three in the first.

When someone tells me Lindor needs to be traded:

Short of them getting a “we would be insane not to take this” trade offer, I really hope Clay Holmes is in the rotation for the next three to five years.

Out of state folks: “What does the humidity in the summer really feel like?”

There’s always this gem you can use for Manchester United matches

atUSMNT:

CRKelly

Sepp Blatter: red cards are not ov— Everybody:

Jude Bellingham and Anthony Gordon driving this

As to the reports that Mac Allister played the role of Darrelle Revis against Randy Moss on that goal:

THIBAUT COURTOIS 🫵

The Orlando Magic:

It’s like walking out the door and immediately being greeted by a bucket of water to the face