JP Bradley

@jpbradley

Talk more roll less. Ennie nominated TTRPG designer. Freelance writer. Words for Spire: The City Must Fall and Disposable Bags of Meat. Pancreatitis and coma survivor. Fond of cats. He/him. Enquiries: the.jp.bradley at gmail jpwrites.com

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Bluesky

Ist das dein Profil?Übernimm es — dann gehört dir jpbradley.dirty.social.Profil übernehmen

JP Bradley@jpbradley· 21d

That's why I have this memorised. You're going to be ok.

Text from the Running the Game section of Heart: The City Beneath which reads: "You don’t need to; the story will work itself out just fine. And if it doesn’t? Okay. It’s not like you’re getting paid for this, and you
can always try again. This isn’t important enough to get worried about doing well."

JP Bradley@jpbradley· 21d

Noodling around at making my own monster for running Dismal Keep and came up with this. I apologise to anyone who can actually do layout for how scuffed this is. I have... A lot to learn. drive.google.com/file/d/11myq...

An image of a woodcut from The Book of British Ballads (Hall 1842) by artist Joseph Noel Paton of a ghost with a skeletal face attacking a man on horseback. The man has a moustache, the horse does not. The horse is, in fact, fucking terrified. The man less so, he might even be into it. Like that one episode of Star Trek The Next Generation when Dr. Crusher fucked that ghost. It was like an heirloom horny ghost, which gets more fucked up the longer you think about it.

Anyway, this is accompanied b text: vengeful Revenant 9Hp/3 Armour, Elite, Ghost, Cursed. A statline for a monster for The Dismal Keep, Scott Malthouse's new dungeon ttrpg, which I am sure he is really happy having associated with horny sci-fi shows from the 90's.

JP Bradley@jpbradley· 24d

pig²

Block of ultra processed ham from the "is this ham processed?" Reddit post.

JP Bradley@jpbradley· 25d

Like this?

JP Bradley@jpbradley· 27d

Writing up a play guide for my Dark Heresy players cause I am trying some stuff out to help me make meaningful choices for my adventures.

Writing for a guide for TTRPG players in my Dark Heresy game which reads: "The Golden Rule: Genre Action: If in doubt think about Dark Heresy as a gritty movie, noir crossed with Cthulhu. If you don’t know what to do from where you are, declare a Genre Action and pick something like; go snooping around on a hunch, get into trouble with the local heavies, hit the bottle, consult the weird artefact etc.
I will drop you into a scene and guarantee you a Clue or free Deduction from it to point you in the right direction."

JP Bradley@jpbradley· 27d

I'm struggling to write this week, this freewrite was a bit of fanfic from about a week ago, trying to channel some of Fleming's egotism. To really sell the effect I would need to list everything Bond ate.

Waiting. Always the damn waiting.
Bond smoked his third cigarette with practiced wistfulness. An Englishman abroad, affecting the casual air of a man with neither plan nor business. He pushed down the restless ache in his limbs, which strained against his tan suit with the urgent need to be doing something. He conjured M’s disapproving face, paler with each year The Circus put him in direct opposition to the Ministers and Whitehall penny pinchers.
What a way to waste a view.
August in Paris was a sweltering affair, perspiration was putting the starch of his collar to the test. It was an ordeal soothed only by the Parisians alighting to the south coast. Leaving Paris a shell inhabited by the hermitage of English and American tourists, and the remaining contingent of enterprising garcon who sought to part them from their francs.
This exodus to the Mediterranean apparently included a good chunk of Section F.
“A temporary affair.” M said, working detritus from his pipe with vigour. “Six weeks at most.”

JP Bradley@jpbradley· 28d

writing only makes me stupider

Text from a TTRPG 1 pager which reads: "Sandy Uppercut, Deuteragonist, Subject of Gender Envy
10 LIFE, Power 3
2 Hits: Sandy Uppercut’s Sandy Uppercut: Power 6 and Knockdown"

JP Bradley@jpbradley· 29d

Star Citizen, hunting Xenothreat and grinding the current event before 4.9 drops.

A screenshot from Star Citizen of a cockpit with a character in a space suit standing watching a pilot and copilot as they navigate amongst the stars.

JP Bradley@jpbradley· Jul 10

Companies care more about control than money. Case in point; if Games Workshop would let Fatshark do a femboy skitarii cosmetic for Darktide everyone could retire to private islands and roll around on stacks of cash for the rest of their lives.

A screenshot from Warhammer 40,000 Darktide of a Skitarii with a cog fan on their helm, a red coat with a cogwork pattern and spindly mechanical limbs.

JP Bradley@jpbradley· Jul 8

I guess it's time to finish Ghostwire: Tokyo.

A screenshot from Ghostwire: Tokyo of the Tokyo tower surrounded by lights, a Tori gate at its base.

JP Bradley@jpbradley· Jul 7

I'm about halfway through Ghostwire: Tokyo and the rhythm of the gameplay is better with some more tools, but not stellar. Still the best part of the game is their rendition of Tokyo, which looks fantastic and has real ambience.

A screenshot from Ghostwire: Tokyo of a man in a giant sushi costume in a forest surrounded by fireflies.

A screenshot from Ghostwire: Tokyo of an alleyway with an illuminated hoarding half obscured at the end, reflected in the water on the floor.

A Screenshot from Ghostwire: Tokyo of a two tailed cat in a robe floating in the air and tending a convenience store.

JP Bradley@jpbradley· Jul 6

Medical leave gaming continues with Ghostwire: Tokyo If you recreate your city and let me wander round it in first person I'm going to be charmed by it.

A screenshot from Ghostwire: Tokyo of a Shibuya street in the rain.

JP Bradley@jpbradley· Jul 2

I like Battletech a lot but this diagram should be a good primer on why I find the rules too fiddly to really love.

Intervening terrain diagram from the new Battletech core box via https://www.tumblr.com/is-the-battlemech-cool-or-not/820861818673233920/some-very-nicely-made-reference-charts-included which depicts to mechs on different terrain levels and whether wood hexes at various levels would impact line of sight.

JP Bradley@jpbradley· Jul 1

Guess who managed to cobble together the worst 3 hours of sleep you've ever seen and is still in A&E

A picture of a very tired looking white guy with a beard and messy brown hair.

JP Bradley@jpbradley· Jun 29

Herbie hangs out on my desk to this day and I've had him all my life

A picture of a stuffed hedgehog plush hand puppet.

JP Bradley@jpbradley· Jun 28

Woah there traveler, take a second and listen to the rain and the birds. You deserve a quiet moment before you continue down the timeline.

JP Bradley@jpbradley· Jun 26

I just want to write rules and make lore for people to use. I don't have it in me to build a company, so as ever:

Text from jpwrites.com of JP's writing portfolio which reads: "Published Work

A selection of JP's published works for various indie TTRPGs. You may expand this section by hiring him.

Crime, Sin: A Spire Sourcebook for Spire: The City Must Fall, by Rowan Rook and Decard"

JP Bradley@jpbradley· Jun 26

Good morning. Our thunderstorm has finally arrived.

JP Bradley@jpbradley· Jun 25

Just to demonstrate this, we're forecast a 13C drop in the max temperature where I am in the next 4 days. We need to improve our infrastructure to manage these periods because we it's never sustained enough for us to adapt.

A report from the Met office showing the current temperature, 31C, and the temperature for the next few days, showing highs of 33C on Thursday and Friday dropping to a high of 20C on Sunday.

JP Bradley@jpbradley· Jun 23

Dinner was good.

Dinner of Tteokbokki, mandu and chicken wings with a grape jelly drink. Served on get posted on a wooden table.

JP Bradley@jpbradley· Jun 21

It's too warm and this is the coolest it's going to be this week.

JP Bradley@jpbradley· Jun 19

Tonight was a fakeaway and as the first pizza I've had in about 6 months I made ham and pineapple, because I can.

Picture of a home made ham and pineapple pizza, sticky chicken wings and an Asahi 0.0

JP Bradley@jpbradley· Jun 15

Hey, I'm V and this is my Stand Silverhand. Know where we can get some squid ink pasta.

A screenshot from Cyberpunk 2077 of V; a woman with a tall pink and teal pompadour wearing pink and purple pants and a jacket, standing in front of Johnny Silverhand, a man in shades with slick back hair and a mechanical arm. They are posing like the characters from Jojo's Bizarre Adventure in front of a sign which reads "Fuck to Death" in pink neon and several 18+ signs.

JP Bradley@jpbradley· Jun 14

Hank Scorpio

Hank Scopio from The Simpsons season 8 Episode "You Only Move Twice", a man with brown hair and a beard wearing a green sweater and jeans. Here he is depicted laughing maniacally and using a flamethrower.

JP Bradley@jpbradley· Jun 12

I have been told this is also a video game.

A screenshot from Cyberpunk 2077 depicting V, a woman with a high pompadour in pink and teal with a matching jacket stands beside Judy, a woman with green and black hair wearing overalls hanging off one shoulder. V is smoking. They both stand in front of a sign of lips and stickers depict fanged lips and a Night City sticker with a palm tree and skull in the shape of the setting sun.

JP Bradley@jpbradley· Jun 12

I was supposed to be playing games with my friends at 8 last night, then Death Stranding happened.

Text from a discord message from "JP" which reads:

"Oh you've had first credits, how about second credits?

By the way, 1st credits? 90 fucking minutes ago.

At 7 o'clock I was like; this is the final boss, it cannot take more than an hour and Kojima was like; no, fuck you actually."

JP Bradley@jpbradley· Jun 8

Death Stranding continues to be fascinating. Kojima's foibles are still in full effect, for better and for worse. I feel compelled to talk about it but I want to finish it first.

A screenshot from Death Stranding; a figure laden with cargo is walking in the foreground down a snowy landscape, in the distance a shack sits beneath a vortex of cloud in the sky.

JP Bradley@jpbradley· Jun 6

I am taking a big rest day and spending it... Pretending to be a courier.

A screenshot from Death Stranding of the main character, Sam Porter Bridges, with a pack on running across the wilderness. A rocky escarpment is to his left, in the distance there is a waterfall shrouded in mist.

JP Bradley@jpbradley· Jun 4

This is one straight from the blog to the cutting room floor.

Nobody is meaner to you than your own mind and the infinite canvas of nothingness.

JP Bradley@jpbradley· Jun 4

Principality of Zeon Zaku Piloting Academy Day 1 Challia: I will be you instructor, Challia Bull. Me: Oh cool we get to pick our own names? I'm Testarossa Bigdick