Dr. Kurtis Hanlon

@kurtishanlon

An assistant professor in premodern Japanese Language and Literature at Palacký University. Researching literature, especially waka, and its intersection with play. Former lecturer at Yale, UBC. Designated departmental baker (he/him)

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YouTube Bluesky

Ist das dein Profil?Übernimm es — dann gehört dir kurtishanlon.dirty.social.Profil übernehmen

Dr. Kurtis Hanlon@kurtishanlon· 9d

If you see this quote the energy you bring to bluesky

Dr. Kurtis Hanlon@kurtishanlon· 24d

I'm always in the mood to make a meme I can use in my opening day lecture slides.

$The Invincible meme where Nolan is lecturing Mark. Fighter jets buzz by in the distance with the words "trillions of dollars, massive data centers, millions of gallons of water, insane amounts of electricity" written above them, while Nolan glares at them with "imagination and a cup of coffee" written over him. In the second frame, he turns to Mark and yells, "look what they need to mimic a fraction of our power."$

Dr. Kurtis Hanlon@kurtishanlon· 26d

Don't post AI slop. It's the aesthetic of fascism.

Batman breaks a rifle with "AI slop" written over the shards. He grunts, "This is the weapon of the enemy. We do not need it. We will not use it."

Dr. Kurtis Hanlon@kurtishanlon· Jul 13

I mean, seriously, what DM wouldn't enjoy something like this as a handmade prop? I wouldn't even charge much as labor costs; it'd mostly be postage. I'd take the hit just to put more non-AI-slop materials into the world. Imagine your party finding this nailed to a tree after your carriage heist.

A sheet of paper is festooned with calligraphic writing in a dark blue ink. The top is in large black letter, the middle in medium chancery cursive, and the bottom in small chancery cursive. It reads, "The Baron von Kleist hereby decrees that the band of outlaws who stole from his carriage are subject to execution. Those found to be harboring the criminals or to have received The Baron's stolen property will be considered equally guilty."

Dr. Kurtis Hanlon@kurtishanlon· Jun 22

At least he waits until you're done to search for the fish. Our turtle just climbs right up and tries to take it from our mouths!

A yellow bellied slider turtle is climbing up the front of a purple jacket worn by the woman who owns him as she sits on the floor. She is holding chopsticks which she is using to eat sushi, and the turtle is craning his neck to reach up for the fish he smells on her breath.

Dr. Kurtis Hanlon@kurtishanlon· Jun 5

Made some Nutella chocolate chip cookies to celebrate finishing my first round on a state exam committee here in Olomouc. But it's the weekend so I can't take them into my colleagues like I normally do...

Rows of a couple dozen dark brown cookies sit cooling on parchment paper. They have dark chocolate chunks spread throughout and a Nutella swirl running through the dough.

Dr. Kurtis Hanlon@kurtishanlon· May 26

Darn. I ordered a portable AC unit last night hoping it'd be ready for pickup today, but the payment didn't go through until this morning and so it'll be ready tomorrow. But I'm hot nooooooow.

Dr. Kurtis Hanlon@kurtishanlon· May 23

Feels like they're leaving out a very important detail upon the landing...

Dr. Kurtis Hanlon@kurtishanlon· Apr 26

We were walking around Vienna, peeping at tchotchke, and I thought "why have jello shots when you can have cello schnapps?" I was very proud of myself for that one.

In a souvenir display case full of Mozart themed chocolates and gifts, there is a small clear bottle of fruit schnapps in the center, shaped like a cello.

Dr. Kurtis Hanlon@kurtishanlon· Apr 4

Shhh, don't tell my departmental librarian, but I'm doing a little handy work to make a nice acrylic platen for our book scanner. It may not be the cleanest handiwork job, but for $15 USD of materials it ain't bad. This is also a neat trick for if you ever need to glue something at 90 degrees.

A kitchen table has become a work surface to glue together acrylic. On a protective sheet of baking paper, two pieces of clear acrylic are being glued together to create a 90° platen for book scanning. The vertical piece is held up by alternating glass bottles on either side of it, which ensures that the piece remains at 90° as the glue cures.

Dr. Kurtis Hanlon@kurtishanlon· Apr 2

Me and my alpha Gardevoir. 🎶 All I wanna do is see you turn into A Giant Woman, A Giant Wooooman All I want to be is someone who gets to see A Giant Woman 🎵

A picture of a television screen with Pokemon Legends ZA on it. In the center of the screen in the player character, dressed up in fancy purple duds in the middle of the park gazebo. But more important is the gigantic green and white Gardevoir standing next to him. She's so tall that his head only comes up to her waist.

Dr. Kurtis Hanlon@kurtishanlon· Mar 26

Yeah, the cats are in that late afternoon "I'm over it" phase of the day, but the drinks and treats are great here.

Three various cats sit in a cafe, all ignoring the camera completely. One that is white with tan spots is looking out the window at the park below, a calico is on a table looking at the dining room, and a long haired Himalayan looking one is on the chair, sleeping.

A cafe spread of drink and cake. On the right is a white teapot with a straining spoon sticking out of it, on the left is a teacup with black tea and milk, and in the center is a layered cake with chocolate cake on the bottom, tart cheese above that, and a hard chocolate shell on top. The cake is a Czech dessert called Míša řezy.

Dr. Kurtis Hanlon@kurtishanlon· Mar 17

Dr. Kurtis Hanlon@kurtishanlon· Mar 7

A panel from the Calvin and Hobbes comic strip. Calvin stands next to a cardboard box with the word "transmogrifier" sloppily written on the side. He extends his arms towards the box with a patronizing look on his face as he explains, "You step into this chamber, set the appropriate dials, and it turns you into whatever you'd like to be."

Dr. Kurtis Hanlon@kurtishanlon· Feb 23

More snoozing pets! Some pictures of Kame-chan snoozing over the last few winter months.

A yellow bellied slider turtle sits submerged on a platform. His eyes are closed and his right leg is tucked into his neck while his left leg helps him balance on the platform in his sleep.

A yellow bellied slider turtle sleeps with his face smashed into the corner of his basking bubble. His front legs are tucked in and his claws drape against the side of his face.

A yellow bellied slider turtle sleeps nestled between a blue blanket and a beige cushion. His eyes are closed and his face pressed down into the blanket.

A yellow bellied slider turtle sleeps in the middle of his basking bubble. One leg is tucked in and one is slightly splayed out at an angle. His back legs, although hard to see, are fanned out behind him to catch the rays of the heat lamp.

Dr. Kurtis Hanlon@kurtishanlon· Feb 20

I finally had a moment today to go spend some of the birthday cash my family gave me. The housing is plastic, but that's fine with me. It's not like I throw it around the kitchen, and it was light enough to carry home. Now I have to do some baking over the weekend.

A big black box sits on a kitchen table. The box contains a stand mixer, or a "kitchen robot" as the Czech reads on the box. The picture shows a variety of different attachments, including grinders, paddles, hooks, and even a blender.

Dr. Kurtis Hanlon@kurtishanlon· Feb 17

I have wifi in my apartment now!

Dr. Kurtis Hanlon@kurtishanlon· Feb 15

A small collection of recent photos of Kame-chan that Lizzy has been sending me. It hasn't been a full two weeks away from him, and I already miss our little baby. Enjoy the timeline cleanse.

A yellow bellied slider turtle sits on white carpet. His head is cocked towards the camera, as if he's sizing up the viewer with his piercing yellow eyes.

A yellow bellied slider turtle is sitting on white carpet. His neck is fully craned to his left to look at the camera. It's a very "boom" pose he's giving, with a slightly cocked head and an expression of disaffection.

A yellow bellied slider turtle sits mostly submerged while balancing on a platform in his water tank. His left front leg is out with his claws splayed against the glass, while his back right leg is extended upward with his toes fanned out as they break the water's surface.

A yellow bellied slider turtle sits submerged on a platform in his tank. His front legs are tucked in and his eyes are completely closed as he snoozes away and dreams of worms.

Dr. Kurtis Hanlon@kurtishanlon· Feb 8

I went to the Olomouc zoo to have some fun on my birthday, and then ordered my first draft beer at a restaurant in Czechia. Pilsner Urquell is much tastier as a draft than out of a can. It's funny how quickly you learn the phrases you need to get by when you move somewhere new. Na zdraví!

A beer sits on a green coaster on a brown table. It's in a Czech style glass, which is barrel-shaped with smooth sides and a faceted bottom. The beer is a light amber with a good 2cm of foam on top.

Dr. Kurtis Hanlon@kurtishanlon· Feb 2

"Which one of you flatfoots ate my sandwich?"

A white plastic clamshell sits open, balanced on the photographer's leg. It is empty save for one slice of pickle and a few spots of grease and BBQ sauce.

Dr. Kurtis Hanlon@kurtishanlon· Feb 2

Having a quick spot of lunch at the airport, a last taste of BBQ as I leave Kansas City for Prague! This sandwich smells really good.

A sandwich sits in a white plastic clamshell, perched on the photographer's leg. There is sliced pork brisket on a brioche bun with cheddar sauce and BBQ sauce.

Dr. Kurtis Hanlon@kurtishanlon· Jan 26

I've been thinking about this quote from Constantine, and also the fact that the proverb of the prodigal son includes him humbling himself before being welcomed home with open arms. No reason.

Dr. Kurtis Hanlon@kurtishanlon· Jan 16

Timeline cleanse. Kame-chan was super cute as he was sleeping today. Look at his neck fat!

A yellow bellied slider turtle sits in a black textured plastic bubble basking in a heat lamp. He has both front legs extended with his left hand over his right, creating a cris-cross pattern with his claws, and he has his head tilted to the side as he rests it on his left arm. His eyes are closed in undisturbed sleep.

A yellow bellied slider turtle sits in a black textured plastic bubble basking in a heat lamp. His left arm is withdrawn, and his right arm is splayed out, with his elbow tucked up to his face. His eyes are closed as he sleeps, and his head is partially withdrawn, creating a roll of neck fat that frames his face.

Dr. Kurtis Hanlon@kurtishanlon· Jan 13

Yeah, we know, that's why we've been protesting!

A red sign sits next to a small pond that reflects the lit trees on the opposite bank. The sign reads, in all capital letters, "Unsafe Ice, keep off"

Dr. Kurtis Hanlon@kurtishanlon· Dec 25

Santa visited Kame-chan, who's at my in-laws while we're in California. I'm sure he appreciated it.

A yellow bellied slider turtle is floating at the top of the water in his tank, waving at the camera. Outside his tank hangs a tiny stocking that is stuffed to the brim with a variety of lettuces.

Dr. Kurtis Hanlon@kurtishanlon· Dec 25

I made dinner rolls for our family's Christmas lunch. Brushed them with a honey butter wash, and I'm excited to dig in.

A set of 18 rolls sits in an enameled baking tray, glistening with a honey butter glaze.

A set of 18 rolls sits in a green enameled baking tray, glistening with a honey butter glaze. A red silicone brush sits in the bottom right of the frame.

Dr. Kurtis Hanlon@kurtishanlon· Dec 9

you will be visited by 3 spirits

A set of 3 hanafuda cards on a tatami mat. The cards form the inoshikachō combination, made up of the boar with the red bush clover, the deer with the autumnal colored maple leaves, and the butterfly with red carnations.

Dr. Kurtis Hanlon@kurtishanlon· Dec 5

A shot of Poe Dameron in The Rise of Skywalker, telling the gathered rebels, "Somehow, Jesper Juul has returned."

Dr. Kurtis Hanlon@kurtishanlon· Nov 11

Day 10. カメちゃんに伸びてあくびで恵まれた By my turtle Stretching and yawning I have been blessed.

A yellow bellied slider turtle sits on a carpet with his back legs splayed out and his front legs stretching forward. His mouth is open in a big yawn, accentuated by his closed eyes.

Dr. Kurtis Hanlon@kurtishanlon· Oct 31

Okay, I've been out here about 3 hours and I've gotten between three and four dozen kids coming by. My feet can't take the 50° weather anymore. I'll leave candy out for any latecomers, but I'm going inside to get warm.