environmental storytelling (the restaurant is directly across the street from the high school)

glad the dev team agrees with me

i love colorado

she needs a name... 2oz reposado tequila 1oz lime juice 3/4oz blue curacao 1/2oz velvet falernum 1/2oz simple syrup 4 dashes hot bitters (could use more tbh)

instructions unclear, rogue is now agender

alien script

clock!

anyone else getting this effect with their hrt? my left side is responding WAY more than my right is lol

i dont need the dumpster wolves i dont need the dumpster wolves i dont need the dumpster wolves

my mom nabbed this chair from a starbucks that was being remodeled so im gonna make a seat cushion for it and use it to replace my very sad recliner total cost: $30 for the cushion material, batting, and fabric

oh thats where @aftii.gay works out...

people 5 minutes into a conversation with me:

i had a cursed idea tonight maybe ill make it tomorrow

age gap toxic old man yaoi among my coworkers

was putting my pins from the bookshop in london on my backpack when i spotted this

its a simple question idk why theyre so confused

upside: this is the least bitter one ive made so far downside: my head is on fire

me: why is my living room always so fucking hot? this fucking beast in the corner:

something tells me theres a problem with the office internet

haha im in danger

its not even the most unhinged thing on the listing its just the funniest out of context

my mom just sent me the best zillow listing ive ever seen

its emerald,,

Post a random picture or else everything will go bad in July

this looks like a concerning urine sample 2/10 flavor not worth the amusing visual

ill be honest i didnt think thistle could grow that big

your beach bum bartender

for my fellow aging ones

crying what a fuckin pair to be top 2 im a sarcastic bitch but only when i know what the hell is going on