At least Marcia would never

When the air is only moderately unhealthy

What air knowledge are they keeping from us in Little Italy (and why didn't they share it with Corso Italia)?

The Great Lakes shouldn't be this hot

Crash (1996), dir. David Cronenburg

I will not be going to my son's wedding. Thank you for your attention to this matter.

Finally got my bread settlement money. Still mad at Pete Buttigieg though.

The millennial song verdict has long been delivered

Béisbol!

I'm so tired

Actually, if the Seahawks win this man will be a champion. I'll take it.

"Cayenne, like the pepper in my socks."

This is the ultimate Canadian football score

Him too

Locked in

Ready for more Blue Jays baseball

Current mood

Growing up with the Calgary Cannons means that I can't hate the Mariners. Go Jays, but these other guys are alright.

Breaking: all consultants are now too young to remember the Iraq War

Marco, I'm flattered but you're really not my type

I'm going to become a smuggler, but for foreign cinema

Go Jets

Excited to use this as a reply

Canadian conservatives pivot to day-drinking and yelling "meth."

Marge Simpson, welcome to the resistance.

Sometimes you have to put on your good cowboy hat, gain 100 lbs, and stand in front of your shower curtain to give an interview about committing some light treason.

Once again #ONPoli