Mike Rampton

@mikerampton

Author, journalist, hero, dad, sleepy etc. He/him. Cambridge, UK. Please buy the fun, funny books I write for children and grown-ups. mikerampton.com / interestingskull.beehiiv.com

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Ist das dein Profil?Übernimm es — dann gehört dir mikerampton.dirty.social.Profil übernehmen

Mike Rampton@mikerampton· 13d

Not 100% sure about the cropping choices on this page from Gerard Depardieu’s cookbook.

A page from Gerard Depardieu’s cookbook in which he is wearing a vest and holding a fully-grown sheep the way smaller men would hold a puppy. You can see the sheep’s whole deal junkwise.

Mike Rampton@mikerampton· 29d

Along with @louiestowell.bsky.social and @athenakugblenu.bsky.social I am in issue eight of The Epistle, the school newspaper of a Cambridge school that I think is called St Paul’s. They have a Newspaper Club and do an issue every term. Excellent work!

A spread from the school newspaper The Epistle, featuring interviews with myself, Loki author Louie Stowell and History’s Most Epic Fails author Athena Kugblenu.

Mike Rampton@mikerampton· Jun 4

And if you'd rather learn about it in video form, here you go!

Mike Rampton@mikerampton· Jun 4

Adulting Made Easy is out today. It's £9.99 and will 100% make you more than that back in terms of saved time and reduced stress. And if it doesn't, and you have loads of spare time and no stress, you won't miss that tenner, will you? Therefore please buy my fun book. uk.bookshop.org/p/books/adul...

The cover of Adulting Made Easy: Life Skills For The Reluctant Grown-Up by Mike Rampton, showing cartoon drawings of various household tasks.

Mike Rampton@mikerampton· Jun 1

My new book is out on Thursday. ADULTING MADE EASY explains everything from cleaning toilets to avoiding debt, from boiling an egg to never having to fold a fitted sheet. Master small talk, stop lying to your dentist, and cook without giving anyone diarrhoea. uk.bookshop.org/p/books/adul...

The cover of Adulting Made Easy by Mike Rampton, with the subtitle "Life skills for the reluctant grown-up". It shows a variety of household items that might be used in cooking and cleaning.

Mike Rampton@mikerampton· May 19

I wrote a sort of poem about the three books I have coming out in the same month (Solve The World's Greatest Mysteries, So Bad It's Good: The Art Of The Terrible Joke and Adulting Made Easy). Mysteries is out now, Jokes is out on Thursday and Adulting on June 4th. This video's really good I think.

Mike Rampton@mikerampton· May 15

Three books coming out within a calendar month? Don't mind if I do! Solve The World's Greatest Mysteries came out last week, So Bad It's Good: The Art Of The Terrible Joke is out next Thursday, and Adulting Made Easy is out on June 4th. They're all really good! I work extremely hard!

My hand holding three books: Solve The World's Greatest Mysteries, So Bad It's Good and Adulting Made Easy.

Mike Rampton@mikerampton· May 13

I have two really funny books coming out in the next few weeks, perfect as Father's Day gifts or just for yourself because you're great. Get 20% off SO BAD IT'S GOOD: THE ART OF THE TERRIBLE JOKE (out May 21) and ADULTING MADE EASY (out June 4) at Bookshop.org with the code PREORDER20. Cheers!

The cover of ADULTING MADE EASY: LIFE SKILLS FOR THE RELUCTANT GROWN-UP, showing a toothbrush, washing machine, shower, money and soap. The cover is shown within a voucher advertising 20% off if purchased from Bookshop.org between May 13th and 17th with the code PREORDER20.

The cover of SO BAD IT'S GOOD: THE ART OF THE TERRIBLE JOKE, showing a banana skin primed to be slipped on. The cover is shown within a voucher advertising 20% off if purchased from Bookshop.org between May 13th and 17th with the code PREORDER20.

Mike Rampton@mikerampton· May 7

SOLVE THE WORLD'S GREATEST MYSTERIES, written by me and illustrated by Gareth Conway, is out today and a lot of fun. uk.bookshop.org/a/15535/9780...

The cover of Solve The World's Greatest Mysteries by Mike Rampton, illustrated by Gareth Conway. The cover shows a huge magnifying glass looking at clues alluding to cases like the curse of Tutankhamun, the Yeti, the Oak Island mystery and more. It's fun and colourful but detailed as well and looks like a flippin' great time.

Mike Rampton@mikerampton· May 6

New book out tomorrow! Please buy it!

Mike Rampton@mikerampton· Apr 20

I tried to make an advert for my new book SOLVE THE WORLD'S GREATEST MYSTERIES (out on May 7th from Harper Collins Children's Books) but have slightly lost my voice so it's not amazing. Please buy it though.

Mike Rampton@mikerampton· Mar 24

Exciting! There’s No Such Thing As A Silly Question has been shortlisted for a UK Literacy Association Book Award. These are the only national children’s book awards voted for by teachers, so it’s all rather great. What a lovely list to be on: massive thanks to the UKLA. ukla.org/ukla-book-aw...

The shortlisted titles for the Information Book 3-14+ category of the UKLA Awards:

Choose Your Own Evolution. Written by Jules Howard and illustrated by Gordy Wright (Nosy Crow)

Frog. Written by Isabel Thomas and illustrated by Daniel Egnéus (Bloomsbury)

Graphic Novel Builder: The illustrated guide to making your own comics Written and illustrated by Edward Ross (Collins)

Me and My Hair. Written by Kimberley Kinloch and illustrated by Jessica Gibson (Usborne)

The Endless Sea. Written by Chi Thai and illustrated by Linh Dao (Walker Books)

University of Cambridge: There’s No Such Thing as a Silly Question. Written by Mike Rampton and illustrated by Guilherme Karsten (Nosy Crow)

Mike Rampton@mikerampton· Mar 2

I wrote the cover story for this month's The Week Junior Science+Nature, on shelves now. It's such, such a cool magazine: positive, fun, beautiful and absolutely fascinating. Lovely stuff!

The cover of the March 2026 issue of The Week Junior Science+Nature. It's a colourful, beautiful, exciting cover being the main headline "How? What? Why? Discover how science starts with asking questions".

Mike Rampton@mikerampton· Feb 23

This very fun new book I wrote comes out on June 4th. It's called Adulting Made Easy and is a warts-and-all guide to cooking, cleaning, health, bills and relationships, written by me — a filthy, broke idiot. It's handy, hilarious and available for preorder: uk.bookshop.org/p/books/adul...

The cover of Adulting Made Easy by Mike Rampton. It has the subtitle "Life skills for the reluctant grown-up" and shows a toothbrush, some fruit and veg, a pair of scissors, a shower, some money, a washing machine, soap and toothpaste.

Mike Rampton@mikerampton· Feb 17

There is a chunky 25% off my new book SOLVE THE WORLD'S GREATEST MYSTERIES (out on May 7th) if you preorder it from @waterstones.bsky.social (website or app) and use the code FEB26. It's illustrated by my Poo What Where pal Gareth Conway and is loads of fun.

A flyer for a book offer: 25% off RRP on books coming soon. Pre-order SOLVE THE WORLD'S GREATEST MYSTERIES, written by Mike Rampton and illustrated by Gareth Conway, with the code FEB26. Offer valid from the 17th to the 20th of February, online only. selected lines only. Ts&Cs available on Waterstones.com. The cover of the book shoes a magnifying glass looking at a collection of mysterious images: a Yeti, an alien, buried treasure and the mask of Tutankhamun.

Mike Rampton@mikerampton· Feb 13

Tickets for the Cambridge Literary Festival are available from 10am today. They're free, so if seeing better authors — @athenakugblenu.bsky.social, @louiestowell.bsky.social, Cressida flipping Cowell — you might as well watch me flail for a bit too. www.cambridgeliteraryfestival.com/events/mike-...

Part of the programme for the Cambridge Literary Festival advertising my talk. Saturday 25 April, 4-5pm, Palmerston Room, ages 7-11. Mike Rampton: Become A Genius. Do you want to become the world’s greatest clever-clogs? Then this is the event for you! Writer, journalist, and occasional stand-up comedian Mike Rampton joins the festival to share his most hilarious and interesting facts that you don’t learn in school. From how to milk a cow, to the history of the duckbilled platypus, Mike has all the answers in his new book, Become a Genius in a Year!

Mike Rampton@mikerampton· Feb 9

In what very much seems like a mistake, but might get me one step closer to being awarded the key to the city, I will be doing a turn at the Cambridge Literary Festival on April 25th. Tickets are free but not available yet, so, no idea. www.cambridgeliteraryfestival.com/whats-on/chi...

A picture of me, author Mike Rampton, looking grumpy wearing a party hat. There is an inset of the cover of my book Become A Genius In A Year.

Mike Rampton@mikerampton· Feb 9

This Wednesday, the Dutch version of Become A Genius in A Year is published. I'm not sure why, but it makes me want to listen to Christina Aguilera.

The cover of the Dutch edition of Become A Genius In A Year, a fun children's book written by Mike Rampton and illustrated by Gareth Williams. The Dutch title is Hoe Word Je Een Genie In Één Jaar, but the words Genie and Jaar are really big which I guess is the centre of my pathetic Christina Aguilera joke.

Mike Rampton@mikerampton· Feb 6

I don’t know how to link The Apprentice to my book about poo beyond “Sir Alan Sugar” being an anagram of “Anus Rag Liars”, potentially a group of people who don’t wipe but say they do.

A text message reading “On last night’s episode of The Apprentice, they had to make a children’s book, and the men’s (losing team) made one about poo and toilets, which was rubbish. I don’t know how you can use this to promote your better book, but it’s something”

The cover of Poo! What? Where? written by me and illustrated by Gareth Conway

Mike Rampton@mikerampton· Jan 29

More details including the exciting revelation that I have a driving licence here.

A picture of me doing stand-up comedy in front of a rainbow background and wearing my second-favourite dinosaur jumper, with the message "Nuts and bolts. Why limit visits to World Book Day? I’m available pretty much all the time. I think I’m best suited to Years 3-6. I live in Cambridge but can drive. Vroom vroom! I’m not putting what I charge on here because it seems vulgar, but it’s very reasonable. Email me! Happy to do smaller sessions, but might go a bit peculiar by the third. Delighted to sign books, send followup messages, keep in touch etc. Email mikerampton@gmail.com if interested!"

Mike Rampton@mikerampton· Jan 29

TEACHERS, LIBRARIANS ETC. I am available for school visits around World Book Day or, in fact, pretty much any time. I insist on the nastiest staff-room coffee available.

Page one of a flyer saying "Does your school need a visit from Mike Rampton? That’s me! I’m the author of fun, funny non-fiction books for kids and am available for school visits and entertaining talks. Consider getting me in, I’m very good."

The message "Look ay my books! There's SO MCUH stuff in them to talk about!" with the covers of four books I wrote: There's No Such Thing As A Silly Question, Become A Genius In A Year, Solve The World's Greatest Mysteries and Poo! What? Where?

A picture of me, a scruffy middle-aged author, gesticulating while doing a speech. The message says: "I'll talk about: Poo, space, pooing in space, really huge things, how to be an author, spiders I’ve met, using your genius for good (not evil) and being sick.

And lots more! I might also do some clumsy magic tricks, put a bucket on
my head for a while and/or transform a tea towel into a chicken. And I
might shriek a bit. It’s all good stuff."

Picture of me looking smug in a school near a poster advertising my visit. Message reads "I've done a bunch. I'm quite good! This means the awkward, difficult ones (like my ill-fated attempts at playing a character inspired by 1970s wrestlers) are hopefully consigned to the past. I sweat a lot and gesticulate too much but generally hold it together by this point. The kids will laugh, learn and be excited about books: a good time for all!"

Mike Rampton@mikerampton· Jan 17

If anyone is doing a Big Shop today — and it's the weekend, that's what they're for — I am told larger Sainsbury's have Poo! What? Where? on shelves. Pop in for some chicken drumsticks and leave with world-changing bottom literature.

The cover of Poo! What? Where?, written by me and illustrated by Gareth Conway. The cover is yellow and shows a big sewage pipe surrounded by funny characters pooing or being pooed on.

Mike Rampton@mikerampton· Jan 6

I have a new children's non-fiction book, POO! WHAT? WHERE?, written by me and illustrated by Gareth Conway, out on January 15th from Bloomsbury and available hopefully everywhere books are sold. Here's a great video reiterating that.

Mike Rampton@mikerampton· Dec 1

A Christmas joke.

Mike Rampton@mikerampton· Nov 28

Here is a poem about how my books There's No Such Thing As A Silly Question and Become A Genius In A Year would make excellent Christmas presents. They are available from all the usual websites, bookshops etc. Please buy them for your loved ones.

Mike Rampton@mikerampton· Nov 21

This fun, knackering, mindblowing book, SOLVE THE WORLD'S GREATEST MYSTERIES, is coming out on May 7th 2026 from HarperCollins Children's Books. I went full bonkers writing it and am really excited about it coming out. It's orderable now! uk.bookshop.org/p/books/solv...

the cover of SOLVE THE WORLD'S GREATEST MYSTERIES. It's orange and shows a big magnifying glass looking at a bunch of pictures: an alien, a Yeti, Tutankhamun, a treasure chest, mysterious bones, a plane... It's illustrated by Gareth Conway and looks like so much fun.

Mike Rampton@mikerampton· Nov 13

Christmas is coming. A great van taught me that. If you have children to buy presents for, please consider these books I wrote. Both are fun, funny, fact-filled and great for both reluctant and enthusiastic readers. Become A Genius In A Year and There's No Such Thing As A Silly Question: buy them!

The cover of Become A Genius In A Year, written by me and illustrated by Gareth Williams, showing an enthusiastic young boy whose Genius-O-Meter has shot up from Low to WOAH! A fact a day to become a SUPERBRAIN!

The cover of There's no Such Thing As A Silly Question, written by me and illustrated by Guilherme Karsten, showing a small boy with an enormous speech bubble containing smelly cheese, a T.rex skeleton, a volcano, a penguin, toilet paper, a kite, a fishbowl and more. 213 weird questions, expertly answered!

Mike Rampton@mikerampton· Oct 24

It's quite good. It's quite a good achievement I reckon. www.barnesandnoble.com/blog/2025-bo...

A man — he might be quite handsome actually, it's hard to tell because he's doing a silly face — biting into a great-looking hardback book. The man is author Mike Rampton, the book There Are No Silly Questions, written by him and illustrated by Guilherme Karsten. The image proclaims "Barnes & Noble Book of the Year 2025 Finalist".

Mike Rampton@mikerampton· Oct 14

America! Americans! People who know Americans! This big wonderful book I wrote is out in the US today. It's lovely and huge and interesting. Cheers!

Please buy this extremely cool book I wrote, it took forever. AMERICA! THIS BOOK IS OUT TODAY. There Are No Silly Questions, written by Mike Rampton and illustrated by Guilherme Karsten. More than 200 weird and wacky questions, expertly answered with help from academics, scientists and other clever people from the University of Cambridge. It's big! It's beautiful! It's brainy! Available from nosycrow.us

Mike Rampton@mikerampton· Oct 13

I talked about being sick, and being sicked on, at the Park Theatre in Finsbury Park yesterday as part of a @comedyclub4kids.bsky.social show. Really good fun. I am a high-achieving champion entertainer destined for greatness.