Mr
@missedmycue
Piscean. Hazel eyes. I enjoy eating food that other people have made. I feel old. I look old. I am old. I don't have a favourite colour. Partial to using the word partial. Resides in England. I have been cutting my own hair since 1985.
Stupid brain. Two old mates have died in the last fortnight and yesterday I found myself thinking about the rule of three. And now my late mother's brother has died. This is one of my favourite photos, the pair of them as kids in the early 1950s. Bye, Stan.
I was reading the tag that came with my brand new oven gloves and among other things, was surprised at reading some people wash their oven gloves more than twenty times a year.
These are a pair of football socks given to me to wear for my first game representing Chester-Le-Street, Houghton and Washington Schools District Team in 1984. They were too small for this 12 year old and I had to buy my own to play in, and shorts too as I was one of those huge hairy 12 year olds.
Well...for some reason I have just watched an episode of The Space Sentinels. Have I travelled through time? Is it a June,Saturday morning in 1978?
My Dad would have been 88 today if he was still with us. I think it is safe to say many would have described him as a bit of a character. I saw him fall out of his armchair laughing many a time.
Raking through some papers and found a bus pass from when I was a moody looking 16 year old.
I am not kidding You could grate cheese on my left elbow...if you were here with me and had some cheese. I don't have any cheese. This is not an attempt to get you to bring me cheese. Honest guv.
Spent £6:75 on a salad spinner 3 weeks ago and I still have not used it. I fuckin hate myself.
I am very quick to judge. A long time ago, I decided that all men who wear this jacket are usually full time/part time cunts. Sorry if you love your cool jacket and I have offended you, you daft cunt.
LIFE HACK 58351: Got a flesh tearing broken spring in your mattress. Don't just paw it off to a poor relative, give it the invisible fix with sticky tape and you will never have to nefariously get rid of an old mattress again.
Dozed off for a second and woke up thinking it was 1987 with the TV announcer telling me, "This is ITV and here's Michael Elphick in Boon".
Is it possible to give yourself a nose bleed by making your food too hot? Spice wise and temperature. Otherwise I am at a loss.
Has a British style cider ever taken off Stateside? These are lovely, ice cold on a warm day.
I wanted to warn you all. I bought this Dijon mustard not noticing the smooth and hot on the jar. I slathered it on as normal And now I have no nostril hair. For Dijon it is super hot
At what point do you throw away a hair band? And at which point does a hair band become band of hair?
Why did Shabana Mahmood dress like she was playing Uncle Fester's sister today? Is she starring in the new film, Addams Family: Fuck Off Back to Where You Came From
My every day big mug became too small to use anymore. Served me well for over 6 years. RIP ya dirty bastard
The UK's immigration level has dropped, it is in decline. But the way Trump is terrorising his own citizens, I think it is safe to say that there will be a huge influx of American asylum seekers landing on these shores soon.
Has everyone just seen Keir Starmer and the UK Labour Party's latest statement in Razzle? Completely contradicts their earlier press release in Huge Tits Covered In Cum. But seems to partly agree with what they posted on the Child Pornography Hourly website. I'd @ the Labour Party but of course...
Trying to work out which diet to jump on in this newest of years and I think I might go slightly against the grain. The diet which might be worst for me health wise but puts a smile on my chubby chops is the crisps sandwich diet. It works out quite cheap too. Unless you use butter and fancy bread.
Something is very wrong in the universe. I have been aware of a black spot, perfectly in the centre of the palm of my left hand for over a month now...yet...I have not dropped down dead. I knew my pirating days would come back to haunt me
Peeled easily, made the perfect orange elephant...but were not particularly tasty. 5/10. Disappointing.
He was a massive star when I was a kid. From a time when men were men. The Scottish comedy legend Stanley Baxter dies.