Michael M. Jones

@oneminutemonkey

writer. book reviewer. anthologist. owned by cats. very sleepy. often stressed. mostly harmless. cryptically queer. he/him. SFWA. Codex. MFA in Childrens' Literature from Hollins University. I support diversity, inclusion, representation.

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Bluesky

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Ist das dein Profil?Übernimm es — dann gehört dir oneminutemonkey.dirty.social.Profil übernehmen

Michael M. Jones@oneminutemonkey· 7d

Nala the Tiny Angry Princess wishes to return to the corn.

Small orange cat rests in a black travel bag on a blue towel. She looks peaceful. This is a trap.

Michael M. Jones@oneminutemonkey· 10d

Mmmmm asking a lot but okay

A freshly groomed and short-furred Pekinese dog giving the camera epic dubious side eye. She is very soft.

Michael M. Jones@oneminutemonkey· 18d

I don't know if I can be authoritative but I can say these two, in this moment, doing this scene speaks to me.

Pierce Brosnan in a suit, Rene Russo in a sheer black dress, from The Thomas Crown Affair

Pierce Brosnan in a suit without a tie, from the Thomas Crown Affair

Michael M. Jones@oneminutemonkey· Jul 12

Here’s my current supervisor.

A fuzzy black cat with green eyes lays stretched out on a laptop computer on a desk. He’s on his side so you can appreciate the belly which is not a trap.🪤

Michael M. Jones@oneminutemonkey· Jul 12

Merlin from Kingsmen (played by Mark Strong) saying “Fucking Spectacular” aboard a luxury plane.

Michael M. Jones@oneminutemonkey· Jul 12

I feel like this deserves a random cat picture.

A handsome tabby cat with a white chest peers out of a small cat tree. He wishes to be admired.

Michael M. Jones@oneminutemonkey· Jun 17

This reminds me of the comic Money Shot by Tim Seelie and Sarah Beattie…

At a gathering of scientists turned potential porn stars, Doug Koch explains he wants his name to be Supermassive Blsckhole. from the Money
Shot comic book.

Michael M. Jones@oneminutemonkey· May 23

Could be worse.

Three cats on a laptop computer on a desk. All we see are their rears. From left to right: black cat, fluffy orange, short haired tabby.

Michael M. Jones@oneminutemonkey· May 2

Nah, his triggering incident was one of those grocery robots. I can entirely understand the impulse to fight them.

A tall, spindly robot with googly eyes. This is Marty, who roams Martins grocery stores like some sort of omen of doom. Do not turn your back on Marty.

Michael M. Jones@oneminutemonkey· Apr 24

This would be right out!

Promo shot of the old sitcom My Two Dads featuring two men and a teenage girl in a happy family pose.

Michael M. Jones@oneminutemonkey· Apr 19

I have news for you...

announcement about upcoming comic series, Superman: Father of Tomorrow, about Jor-El coming to Earth, coming late May 2026

Michael M. Jones@oneminutemonkey· Apr 13

Old gamers remember this:

A cartridge video game from the 1980s labeled JOURNEY ESCAPE.

Michael M. Jones@oneminutemonkey· Apr 6

I saw those and my mind did a record-scratch. No. Just no. As disturbing and offputting as the below Let's not pretend Doritos have any redeeming value.

A package of Doritos NKD Nacho Cheese flavor. They look like a bad idea.

Michael M. Jones@oneminutemonkey· Apr 2

Poor Dani has never had a really good, iconic outfit that wasn't just her New Mutants uniform with extra flair, or a variation thereof. Her Krakoa-era outfit is good but lacked pizzazz.

Michael M. Jones@oneminutemonkey· Feb 16

How lovely! My tortie Blaze yells hello.

A tortie cat poses prettily next to a computer monitor.

Michael M. Jones@oneminutemonkey· Feb 15

Ah yes. I remember him. After Doomsday killed Superman, many imposters appeared to claim his place. Superkid, The Man of Iron, SuperTerminator, Cyclops, and of course this one, Mexican Superman (the one with real cane sugar). You can still find him in many specialty stores.

four fake Supermen action figures. Kid, guy with visor, cyborg, and the one with a hammer.
(Superboy, Eradicator, Cyborg Superman, Steel)

Michael M. Jones@oneminutemonkey· Jan 26

This is Jack. He is the king of snot rockets and mighty sneezes.

Small grey tabby cat sits on a bookcase next to a computer screen. He looks annoyed but only because he wants attention.

Michael M. Jones@oneminutemonkey· Jan 17

Gremlin feels the same.

Magnificent poofy black cat with crossed paws sits regally next to a computer monitor.

Michael M. Jones@oneminutemonkey· Jan 14

Post Your Favorite Star Trek Character. Wrong Answers Only!

A villain from the 80s show Photon. He’s pasty white with black rimmed eyes, cyber attachments and a laser gun.

Michael M. Jones@oneminutemonkey· Jan 2

This is Nala the Tiny Angry Princess. We never know if she’ll greet or bap. She is sweet and spicy.

Little orange short-haired cat stares at camera while debating how to punish her humans for disturbing her.

Michael M. Jones@oneminutemonkey· Dec 27

I know that feeling. Behold Purrberus, the cat with three asses.

The back ends of a tabby cat, fluffy orange cat, and fluffy black cat. They’re all warming themselves on a closed laptop computer on a desk.

Michael M. Jones@oneminutemonkey· Dec 25

Mostly not a trap.

Black fluffy cat sprawled on a desk, showing fuzzy belly and big glowing eyes.

Michael M. Jones@oneminutemonkey· Dec 21

Many years ago, we had a giant fluffy doofus named Gabriel, whom we thought had Maine Coon in him. Seanan McGuire met Gabriel, and credits him in part with her decision to get (actual) Maine Coons. (No shade on Gabriel! We just didn't know more at the time!)

Large fluffy tabby-ish cat sprawls inelegantly on a stack of cat beds, like the pretty royalty he knew himself to be. Not a Maine Coon.

Michael M. Jones@oneminutemonkey· Oct 22

Eeeeeeeeeeee baby Have a baby Gremlin.

Small poofy black kitten on stack of books and comics.

Michael M. Jones@oneminutemonkey· Oct 11

Reskeet with a frog to scare ICE

The Moat Monster from the episode of Scooby-Doo where they meet Davy Jones of the Monkees. It's a giant frog with red eyes.

Michael M. Jones@oneminutemonkey· Oct 7

Nala the Tiny Angry Princess wants nothing to do with these shenanigans.

A small orange short-haired girl cat with big orange eyes stares out from her cat cave. This is a trap.

Michael M. Jones@oneminutemonkey· Sep 30

Three generations of my family served proudly and honorably so I could be a writer. 🤣 But seriously, they'd all be outraged by Hegseth and what he's doing to our armed forces. This is the ship literally named for my great-grandfather. Would that it rose again as a ghost ship of vengeance.

black and white photo of the USS Claud Jones, a destroyer escort from the 1960s and '70s, as it sails the open seas.

Michael M. Jones@oneminutemonkey· Sep 18

Gideon doesn’t want me to work.

Fluffy orange cat sits on a desk chair. He looks defiant. This is not his chair.

Michael M. Jones@oneminutemonkey· Sep 15

Here’s what happened when I got my guys a new tree for the porch. Gideon (orange) supervised every step and tested it out as an early adopter.

Four cats occupy a blue cat tree on a screened-in porch. From top to bottom: big tabby with white chest; small tabby; tortie; fluffy orange boy.

Michael M. Jones@oneminutemonkey· Sep 13