Brian Smith

@onemorebrian

Newspaper editor; fan of Peanuts and Pac-Man; pessimistic optimist ("The glass SHOULD be half full, but somebody probably drank it already").

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Brian Smith@onemorebrian· 1m

Jeannie's sister, "I Dream of Jeannie." Barbara Eden was stunning as Original Recipe Jeannie, but Extra Spicy Jeannie was captivating in a way that 10-year-old me didn't understand, let alone know how to articulate.

Jeannie II (Barbara Eden, dressed in green and a brunette) stands in the staircase in the Nelsons' Cocoa Beach home, scheming to break up Jeannie and Tony (not shown), in "My Sister, the Home Wrecker," a fifth-season episode of "I Dream of Jeannie".

Brian Smith@onemorebrian· 19h

...and now I'm reading Teenage Girl President strips by @fmarciuliano.bsky.social for the umpteenth time

An installment of Francesco Marciuliano's "Teenage Girl President," a recurring feature in the "Medium Large" webcomic, circa the mid-to-late 2000s (FUN FACT: I deleted this post and reposted it because I did the math wrong and thought it was the early 2010s, ha ha whoops).

The premise: It's a TV show being watched by the guy at left! The "show" started out as a weekly gag strip about how politics is like high school, but I (and I think a lot of readers at the time) became genuinely invested in how a teenage girl juggles the pressures of growing up AND holding the most powerful office in the world...but I digress. Here's the strip itself:

Panel 1: Guy watching a CRT set with rabbit-ears antenna. Announcer: "Tonight on 'Teenage Girl President'..."

Panel 2: Teenage Girl President (TGP), wearing her traditional T-shirt with a big star on it, is holding a meeting with three of her advisers, all middle-aged white guys.

TGP: "Putin has reinstated authoritarian rule in Russia, eliminated almost all independent media, rigged elections and installed former KGB officers in the highest positions of power. Clearly this calls for new U.S. international policy. Your thoughts?"

Adviser 1, thinking: "Damn, she looks fine in that shirt!"

Adviser 2, thinking: "I'd do her."

Adviser 3, thinking: "I wonder if she's into chicks."

Brian Smith@onemorebrian· 1d

Back in the '80s, my dad went flipping through the channels and got to the video for Tears For Fears' "Head Over Heels." Me: "All the girls at school think this is the FUNNIEST video." Dad: ".......why?" Me: "...he's a cute guy acting confused at a library, I don't know what else to tell you"

An attractive librarian (Joan Densmore) grabs an enormous book off the shelf, revealing a singer (Roland Orzabal) in the next aisle trying to get her attention, in a screenshot from Tears for Fears' 1985 video for "Head Over Heels."

And I'm here to tell you: Whether it was because girls in their early teens circa 1985 were starved for comedy, or because this video was so much more lighthearted than Tears for Fears' other videos, or because Orzabal was cute...junior high-aged girls at the time thought this video was *hilarious*.

Brian Smith@onemorebrian· 3d

I think, entirely too often, about this interview response Peter David gave in April 2011 (which isn't the only time he'd told the George Takei wedding story -- but, I mean, if it were MY story, I'd never shut up about it).

Peter David, "writer of stuff," on his time writing Star Trek comics and books:

My very first Trek story? Sure. I was a teenager, it was for a fanzine called “Space-Time Continuum,” it was called “Ramar the Intruder,” and it was basically a male Mary Sue story -- Murray Sue -- about this alien who shows up and falls in love with Uhura. It was, of course, ghastly.
Although, funny coda: A few years ago I attended George Takei’s wedding. And during the reception, Nichelle Nichols was dealing with an injured foot and wound up leaning much of the time on the nearest convenient guy, which happened to be me. I was grooving on that, I can tell you. “I got Uhura on my hip; suck on that, fan boys!”

Brian Smith@onemorebrian· 4d

"And now, this week's trivia question: In the 1980s, what band had the most Top 10 hits on the pop charts AND the soul charts while never existing? The answer? Nobody! No band that never existed had no such hits. Well, there you have it. Keep your head in some stars, and both feet near some clouds."

Dana Carvey as Casey Kasem, "entertainment editor" for Weekend Update, on the October 18, 1986 episode of "Saturday Night Live."

Brian Smith@onemorebrian· 5d

The term "The Switchboard," plus the color and the weapon-like shape, are all giving me real "I'm gonna be a science-fiction hero! Just like Uhura, or Captain Janeway, or Xena!" vibes. b.mino.mobi/palm/

The social media palm-reading tool gives me a 30, "Warm-blooded," and the title "The Switchboard: You keep perfect time because someone is always calling." 99th in Cadence, 90th in Polish, 50th in Vigil, 13th in Lexicon and Drift, 0th in Chorus.

...I'm not sure what it all means but DANG it makes for a very pointy green shape.

Brian Smith@onemorebrian· 9d

It gives me no pleasure to report that there is now a third video, and that the channel is just one more video away from topping 8 minutes of content

The thumbnail for a 1 minute, 24 second video uploaded on August 3, 2026, seven hours before the screenshot was taken. The title is "Fauci pleads the FIFTH and we made a cocktail with Tears of the Left - DR. OUCHIE".

The thumbnail...hoo boy. It's the words "DR. OUCHIE" with syringes through the "O", and there's an AI cocktail glass in the foreground with what could be a weird ice cube or maybe a lemon or maybe some sort of small snake? At left, there's an image of Dr. Anthony Fauci being sworn in and edited to look extra stern and dispassionate, then to the right there's the channel host wearing a surgeon's face mask but he's stroking his beard through it in a "hmmm" way.

In the background, which looks like a Fox News-style nighttime cityscape but is ACTUALLY liquor bottles looking all skyscrapery, there's a neon image of a caduceus, or twin snakes wrapped around a winged staff, the image that has become the symbol of the medical profession -- and if you want to say "ACTUALLY the Rod of Asclepius is the REAL symbol of the medical profession," that's fine, but this alt text is neither the time nor the place.

The video has three views.

Brian Smith@onemorebrian· 9d

This is now neck-and-neck with my favorite "Hollywood Minute" joke, after the 1997 rerelease of "Star Wars": "George Lucas was happy with 'Star Wars' making $36 million opening weekend. Now he can finally afford that sporty Miata he’s had his eye on."

David Spade is shown on the "Weekend Update" set of "Saturday Night Live" for the show's February 8, 1997, episode. At right is a picture of George Lucas.

FUN FACT: The George Lucas joke bombed, and David looked to his right and said, "Thanks for that joke, Norm! REAL DOOZY!", so I've assumed for my whole life that the "Miata" bit was a Norm MacDonald joke (and it certainly reads like one).

Brian Smith@onemorebrian· 9d

Then they tried to turn it into a TV series, and Chiun was played by Roddy McDowall (really).

Roddy McDowall as Chiun, an Asian man (sigh), in the "Remo Williams" TV pilot, sometimes called "Remo Williams: The Prophecy". In this scene from the opening credits, he's aiming a pistol.

Brian Smith@onemorebrian· 10d

Not at all a one-hit wonder, but...I've never been clear on how much of Sheena Easton's transformation between 1981's "Morning Train (Nine to Five)" and 1989's "The Lover In Me" was her own doing, or her time with Prince, or just her thinking "I represent Bally Fitness, I need to act like it."

Quick screengrabs of Sheena Easton videos.

On the left, her circa-1981 video for "Morning Train (Nine to Five)", in which she has a short conservative hairdo and wears a teal jumpsuit. She's holding a lever at a railway station.

On the right, 1989's "The Lover In Me"; her hair is in teased curls, and she's wearing a short red dress and red gloves and stockings. She's posing confidently at a nightclub.

Brian Smith@onemorebrian· 11d

And now I'm back in the universe where these posts weren't just jokes

Chris Scott (@iamchrisscott) tweets on Feb. 19, 2018:
Holy hell: #BlackPanther with the 5th biggest opening of all time

The enclosed chart of the 10 biggest film openings of all time:

1. "Star Wars: The Force Awakens." $247,966,675 in 4,134 theaters.
2. "Star Wars: The Last Jedi." $220,009,584 in 4,232 theaters.
3. "How To Lose A Guy in 10 Days." $218,133,295 in 4,187 theaters.
4. "The Adjustment Bureau." $209,552,671 in 4,012 theaters.
5. "Black Panther." $201,797,000 in 4,020 theaters.
6. "Halloween: Resurrection." $199,318,402 in 4,180 theaters.
7. "The Time Traveler's Wife." $195,112,010 in 4,059 theaters.
8. "The Master." $191,930,552 in 4,220 theaters.
9. "Varsity Blues." $187,003,280 in 4,071 theaters.
10. "As Good As It Gets." $179,353,018 in 4,139 theaters.

4,000 likes, 1,100 quotes, 268 comments, no bookmarks (post was pre-bookmarks).

The same day, Andy Bashford (@andybaashford) replies:
Dang, Black Panther bumping Master of Disguise out of the top 10

41 likes

Brian Smith@onemorebrian· 12d

Frantically trying to figure out if I can MS Paint this outfit white

Samara Weaving, dressed in brown with a full cape and a bare midriff, arrives at the premiere of "Chevalier" at the El Capitan Theatre in Los Angeles on April 16, 2023, in a photo by Jordan Strauss of Invision and distributed by the Associated Press.

Brian Smith@onemorebrian· 12d

Well, THIS political cartoon isn't terrible! It taught me that the United Kingdom will kill its new prime minister if he can't get pregnant.

Michael Ramirez does an elaborate drawing of King Henry VIII (labeled "United Kingdom") embracing a frumpy looking Prime Minister Andy Burnham (his gown clearly reads "Burnham"). The king/the United Kingdom says, "Let me introduce you to my NEW wifey..." The implication is that the king/U.K. has had the previous wives/prime ministers killed or, at best, had the Church of England annul those marriages/choose a new party leader.

I think? It's kind of a mess.

Brian Smith@onemorebrian· 12d

And once again, I'm remembering one of my favorite-ever posts from The Bad Place:

Michael Colton (@mikecolton) tweets:

when you've never heard of "Meryl Streep"

The enclosed screenshot is from a Deadline article and reads, "'The middle streets and the Tom Cruise's are 0.2% of all actors working in this industry today,' she added."

7:53 a.m. July 18, 2023, 516.7 thousand views, 4.1 thousand likes, 351 quotes, 60 comments, 74 bookmarks

Brian Smith@onemorebrian· 13d

I recently rediscovered BBC Radio 2's promotional video from 2018 that's entirely Kylie cover art, and it TOO is never enough.

Brian Smith@onemorebrian· 13d

Plentiful

The first scene in "Dr. Goldfoot and the Bikini Machine" in which the full army of Bikini Machines are visible. Dr. Goldfoot (Vincent Price) is near the center, addressing them all, along with his sidekick, Igor (Jack Mullaney).

The Bikini Machines, per IMDb, include Patti Chandler, Mary Hughes, Salli Sachse, Luree Holmes, Sue Hamilton, Laura Nicholson, China Lee, Deanna Lund, Issa Arnal and Leslie Summers. (That's 10 names, but only nine robots are visible here; I can't be of any more help on this.)

Brian Smith@onemorebrian· 13d

One of the Bikini Machines is Deanna Lund from "Land of the Giants," which is the kind of factoid I drop when I want to prove that I am very very old

Deanna Lund ("Land of the Giants") is introduced in the parade of Bikini Machines from "Dr. Goldfoot and the Bikini Machine."

Brian Smith@onemorebrian· 14d

I appreciate the guidance, but my brain is already filled to bursting with information on how to serve the Road Runner

It's the full list of "Road-Runner Prime Cuts and Chops" from the 1965 Warner Bros. cartoon "Zip Zip Hooray!", the one where the two boys watching Road Runner cartoons on TV openly wonder WHY the Coyote is so desperate to catch the Road Runner in the first place. Wile E. stops the cartoon and addresses the boys directly through the TV with this chart of flavors from various cuts of the bird. Starting from the top feather:
1. Banana
2. Asparagus
3. Papaya
4. Liquorice
5. Vanilla
6. Sponge cake
7. Celery
8. Candied yam
9. Caramel
10. Salami
11. Tamale
12. Chop Suey
13. Noodle
14. Pork chop
15. Cheddar cheese
16. Double martini
17. Bratwurst
18. Yorkshire pudding
19. Pistachio

Brian Smith@onemorebrian· 14d

"Athlete's foot can be cured by applying a small charge of TNT between each toe. Now, many in the medical profession are skeptical about my work. They point to my record of treatment of athlete's foot sufferers: 84 dead, 65 severely wounded, and 12 missing, believed cured."

Graham Chapman from "Monty Python's Flying Circus" as a doctor standing next to a chart showing two figures -- the skeletal system and the circulatory system. He's weighing in on the previous sketch, in which Mrs. Shazam's best friend (name withheld) explodes. Mrs. Shazam has just said "It's funny, isn't it? How your best friend can just blow up like that? I mean, you wouldn't think it was medically possible, would you?"

Graham, as the doctor: "This is where Mrs. Shazam was so wrong. Exploding is a perfectly normal medical phenomenon. In many fields of medicine nowadays, a dose of dynamite can do a world of good. For instance, athlete's foot -- an irritating condition -- can be cured by applying a small charge of TNT between each toe. Now, many of the medical profession are skeptical about my work. They point to my record of treatment of athlete's foot sufferers -- 84 dead, 65 severely wounded, and 12 missing, believed cured. But then, people laughed at Bob Hope! People laughed at my wife when she wrapped herself up in greaseproof paper and hopped into the Social Security office! But that DOESN'T mean that Pasteur was wrong!"

Brian Smith@onemorebrian· 16d

My entry in the “Tell a story in six words or less” challenge will always be this one random guy getting noticed by Ursula her own self:

Ben Mekler, posting his version of the “Hello, Peter” meme from “Spider-Man: No Way Home” on Twitter on August 23, 2021. It’s a photo of Mageina Tovah as Ursula Ditkovich, looking lovely and hopeful.

Mageina Tovah replies:
Oh hey ❤️

Brian Smith@onemorebrian· 16d

I love that the official video for “Man of Constant Sorrow” is less than 3 1/2 minutes, but still uses this shot twice:

Ulysses Everett McGill (George Clooney) smiles as he sees the Sirens in “O Brother, Where Art Thou?”

Brian Smith@onemorebrian· 17d

I do wonder how much money is in the “This you?” industry.

From X, Brian Tyler Cohen:

Why haven't we heard from a SINGLE Democratic state about steps they're taking to counteract the post-VRA GOP power grabs in Louisiana and Alabama and South Carolina and Tennessee and Texas and North Carolina and Missouri and Florida? Is every Democrat asleep at the wheel? Do you think this is going to fix itself? Why is it so fucking difficult for Democrats to fight back? If you're in power in NJ, NY, MD, CO, IL, WA, OR, wake the fuck up and announce steps to redraw the maps so that Democrats are not drawn out of power forever.

Reply, Matt Von Swol:
This you?
Quote post, from Kyle Kulinski; Von Swol has circled “no gerrymandering”:
Imagine if we had automatic voter registration, no gerrymandering, open primaries, ranked choice voting and proportional delegates in every state in every election (Star-eyes emoji)

Brian Tyler Cohen replies to the “This you?”
I mean…no?

May 11, 2026

Brian Smith@onemorebrian· 19d

And if it leads to an era with more stories about teenage interracial couples with big dreams, we call that a...

(deep breath)

This is a screenshot of Tim Kazurinsky on "Saturday Night Live" playing Dr. Badofsky, who would regularly come on and explain all the varieties of various things "that have been discovered recently". In this sketch, he's describing phobias such as the fear of open spaces (agoraphobia), the fear of fluffy sweaters (angoraphobia), the fear of being run over by a small Chevrolet (novaphobia), the fear of constipation (nogophobia) and the fear of diarrhea (gogophobia).

Anyway, I have taken this silly premise and slapped "SaveTheLastDancestasy" onto one of his cards using MS Paint, suggesting that he has already told us about many things ending in some version of "romantasy".

Brian Smith@onemorebrian· 23d

This punchline from a 1985 Mad Magazine parody scans VERY differently in the year 2026, but heaven help me, I've thought of it every time someone has reminded me of Irving for the past four decades.

From Mad Magazine issue 253, cover-dated March 1985, it's the "Cathy" parody from "When All Comic Strip Characters Turn Rotten," written by Larry Siegel and drawn by Bob Clarke. It's four panels, starting with Irving and Cathy sitting on the couch.

Irving: "Cathy, we've been going together for a LONG TIME! What do you say we GET MARRIED?"

Cathy: "Irving, you gotta be KIDDING! Me...marry a SCHMUCK who's even UGLIER than I am...and who's a TOTAL DISASTER in bed?"

Irving: "WHAT? You KNOW none of that is true! Cathy, the only way our relationship can work is for you to BUILD ME UP...not tear me down! I think you owe me an apology!"

Cathy stands off to one side of the couch: "Okay, Irving, I apologize."

Irving: "Appology accepted." [sic]

Cathy: "Good gosh, you closet gays get so EMOTIONAL!"

Irving kneels on the couch, clutches his head and screams.

The bonus Sergio Aragones cartoon up top is a duck hunter who's blowing his duck call, unaware that he's summoned a couple dozen lovesick snakes instead.

Brian Smith@onemorebrian· 24d

Certified Old Guy here: This IS scathing, but it's also specifically a reference to the covers for the mid-1980s "The Official Handbook of the Marvel Universe, Deluxe Edition." John Byrne worked off designs he was given, and in some cases -- like Cyclops here -- they never saw print anywhere else.

It's John Byrne's wraparound cover for the mid-1980s comic, "The Official Handbook of the Marvel Universe Deluxe Edition," issue 3, featuring characters from Cloak to Doctor Octopus. Prominent characters on the cover include, from left, Deathlok, Cyclops (in a blue and yellow outfit with no visible X emblem, a design that never made it to print), Daredevil, Doctor Doom, Doctor Octopus and Dazzler, running in a classic John Byrne action figure pose (legs perfectly straight and at a 90-degree angle).

Brian Smith@onemorebrian· 27d

I was gonna say "The move will deprive the world of great comic book gags like this one," but then I realized that "Sensational She-Hulk" issue 34 came out in 1991, and the internet has already made this gag obsolete.

"Sensational She-Hulk" issue #34, script and art by John Byrne, inks by Keith Williams. Jennifer "She-Hulk" Walters and Louise "Weezi" Mason were just on the phone together in New York, preparing to fly to New Orleans to meet with a consultant in their case, Samuel D. Barone. Weezi has the text box from that discussion, telling Jen, "And meanwhile I'll see if I can scrounge up a N'Orleans city map."

We see the flying car over New Orleans' St. Charles Street, which is lined with buildings. A church overlooks the street in the background.

Weezi: "Yep, this is St. Charles Street. I wonder why our Mr. Barone has his office here, particularly?"

Jen: "Probably because it's the only street in New Orleans that BYRNE could find decent reference for."

Brian Smith@onemorebrian· Jul 13

...wait a minute...

It's Admiral Jean-Luc Picard (Patrick Stewart) from the "Future Imperfect" episode of "Star Trek: The Next Generation, so he already has his future goatee, but I've sloppily added a real hat and an MS Paint set of glasses with a chain off to the side in an attempt to make him look more like Scientist Clark above.

Brian Smith@onemorebrian· Jul 12

As ever, I filter everything through the lens of "Bloom County."

Berke Breathed's "Bloom County," from January 12, 1987. Lawyer Steve Dallas is sitting at a bar with Opus the penguin, shortly after the doctor gave Steve the bad news ("Your body is poo-poo. You have six months to live...unless you stop smoking.")

Steve, holding a martini while keeping a cigarette in his mouth: "So that's it. I quit smoking...or I kick off in six months."

Opus, drinking a school lunch-sized carton of milk with a straw in it: "Ya mean cigarettes...are UNHEALTHY?"

Steve: "Look...I know what I used to tell you..."

Opus, now hysterical: "But...but the TESTS...they...they said smoking is FINE...cures ACNE...HELPS CANKER SORES...THEY...THEY..."

Steve grabs Opus by the shoulders and shakes him: "OPUS!!"

Opus: "What?"

Steve, calmly: "Ol' buddy...there's a chance the American Tobacco Institute's health research is...well...biased."

Opus: "Good Lord."

Brian Smith@onemorebrian· Jul 11

A bunch of panels hosted by this guy

It's Dana Carvey as the Grumpy Old Man from "Saturday Night Live," whose whole deal was "I'm not happy! I don't like things now, compared to the way they used to be." The joke is that everything he describes was objectively worse in the old days.

The screenshot here is from him saying, "In MY day, we didn't have 'hair dryers'! If you wanted to 'blow dry' your hair, you stood outside during a hurricane! Your hair was dry, but you had a sharp piece of wood driven clear through your skull! And THAT'S the way it was and you LIKED it! You LOVED it! Whoopee! I'm a human headkabob!"

Brian Smith@onemorebrian· Jul 9

One more bit about Cathy: Years ago, I posted on Facebook that the local paper had a "Kids Corner" feature in the '80s, and it expanded to add Calvin & Hobbes. A friend joked "I guess Cathy was too obvious a choice," which made me look up the Cathy on Nov. 18, 1985, the day Calvin debuted: