Andrew Tate appears to have been arrested for trying to steal some items of clothing for little girls by walking out of the shop wearing them.

Very sad to hear about the arrest of Andrew Tate. He has been charged with rape, human trafficking, controlling prostitution and actual bodily harm. I once described him as "an important voice for young men", which tells you all you need to know about my moral compass.

Just because my convicted fraudster chum set up an account with an obscure Australian payment company just before his mother transferred £500,000 to Reform from sources the NCA were unable to trace, that doesn't mean there's anything dodgy going on.

I was honoured to speak at the CPAC event, alongside such other luminaries as Jack Posobiec, the guy who invented the conspiracy theory about Hilary Clinton running a satanic paedophile ring from a pizza restaurant.

Liz Truss made a brilliant speech at the UK's first MAGA style CPAC event to a few dozen freaks and weirdos. Her hot topics included moaning about the UK changing Prime Minister too often and saying Andy Burnham would cause a financial crisis. 😂

I give up - Liz Truss just made parody accounts redundant.

Why shouldn't Reform be able to stuff the House of Lords when... er... 1% of MPs are in Reform and over half of those were elected as Tories.

It is pure coincidence that I said I wasn't standing for Parliament because I'd need “a million a year” to cover lost earnings, then I was given £5 million and immediately stood for election.

"Hands up if you think you should have taxpayer funded security, even though you are just a divisive gobshite that nobody voted for"

That totally explains why she encouraged morons to burn innocent people alive then spent all her time spouting bollocks about free speech while supporting the most hateful party around.

Just me walking up the road so I can turn round and march back down again like a tit for the camera.

Zia Yusuf is terrified of being bugged - a sure sign that he has nothing to hide.

Here I am giving a masterclass in how to turn someone's death into valuable social media content while making it all about me.

Just paying my respects to Ann Widdecombe. Or to be more precise, doing a photo opportunity for the press, where Ann may have been mentioned.

Yes, I pay myself rent in order to avoid tax, but it is coincidentally £1 less than the level at which I would have to declare it under Parliament's transparency rules.

The face of a man trying to defend the idea that The Establishment somehow doesn’t include a privately educated multi-millionaire who was handed the family property business or the aristocratic family who gave him even more money.

It is pure coincidence that I resigned just before the story broke about the police investigating a £500,000 donation from the mother George Cottrell, the convicted fraudster who bankrolled me.

"I will fight for Clacton and stand on my record of what I have achieved for the town! Things like... er... and, ah... hmmm... what about, er... that umm... well... I'm pretty sure I visited once"

"You boy, is Nigel Farage still making a tit of himself by fighting a bin?"

Me, preparing to fight The Establishment.

A vulnerable homeless gentleman was found behind some bins, telling pigeons that he was going to run in the Clacton by-election.

"Hands up if you called a by-election to distract attention from your dodgy finances but ended up running against a bin and looking like a right dick"

"Now say a mob of 50 people attacked you and wrecked your car but you didn't bother reporting it!"

"I said Nigel Farage is very principled calling a by-election. What did I say Roy?" "You said he's an attention seeking gobshite who's playing the victim in a desperate attempt to avoid scrutiny"

It's disgraceful that Coutts didn't want to be associated with someone who received mysterious £5 million deposits and was bankrolled by a convicted money launderer.

A thin-skinned bad-tempered prick who's seriously starting to lose his shit? Me?

Here I am slagging off Keir Starmer for accepting some free glasses. Because that is so much worse than accepting £5 million from a crypto billionaire or using the house of a convicted fraudster while he pays for my staff, security and social media.

"Hands up if you start screaming about a witch hunt and dark forces being out to get you every time you are caught red handed being a sleazy grifting sack of shit"

I will be taking legal action against The Times for having the audacity to use facts and information to tell the truth.

Sarah Pochin watching Jude Bellingham score.