Fish finger, lettuce, tomato and tartare sauce panini with chips and mayo. Chips parboiled then cooked in the oven with rapeseed oil, salt and pepper.

It would appear that all the people who were previously ... you know the rest ... are now a combination of Sherlock Holmes, Hercule Poirot, Sam Spade, Father Brown, TinTin, Lord Peter Wimsey, Brother Cadfael and Jonathan Creek. "It's a conspiracy, man!"

Mojtaba Khamenei: "Get outta my Strait!" Donald Trump: "It's my Strait now, Dave!" Mojtaba Khamenei: "No, that's a different show."

So, is he presidential *now*?

Sarah will also be placing this leaflet in all public buildings. 🙄

I have Boccioni's 'Dynamism of a Soccer Player' on my studio wall. 😀

Looks like a flash of the bleedin' obvious to me ...

I always wanted to be Kid Twist. Every Girl Crazy 'Bout A Sharp-Dressed Man!

The current Tory Party is about as stable as Birnam Wood.

I can't believe no-one's done a 'Torn: Arse' AI version of this poster. What's the world coming to?

One of the joys of being in a band is the regular games of Car Jenga. Bass gear and instruments (mine), guitar gear and instruments, harmonica player gear, PA (desk and speakers), stands various, overnight bags, and three people, all fitted into a Ford Galaxy. 😉

This looks like one of those Ames Room pics.

Sweep for BBC Director General ... what could possibly go wrong? (Photo credit: Pauline Cumberland)

Unsolicited Sunday morning knob pic.

“In his house at R’lyeh, dead Cthulhu waits dreaming ... of Halloween.”

Adverts should be representative of traditional British families.

We take you live to a rehearsal room in central London where various European leaders are gathered in order to debut their next career as a Kraftwerk tribute band.

They should be able to name the bread roll for the part of the country in which they wish to settle.

The smartest thing I ever did was let Kirsty persuade me to ask her to marry me. 😍

Alex and her 'Always Offended' comedy chums must be pretty far down their 'That Was The Woke That Was' list by now ... although I see their American pals are talking against chalk now.

I don't have a source for this artwork at the moment, but it seems very apposite.

Peter

" ... but first, the mighty Fall!" (Every John Peel Show, ever)

What the matter, Sooz? Uou haven't touched your TurKraken!

Reform Chief Whip Lee Anderson: 'There is another matter. One I am reluctant to ... ' National Security Advisor Jeffrey Pelt: 'No. Please go ahead.' Anderson: 'Another one of our MPs appears to have suspended himself.' Pelt: 'You've lost *another* MP?' With apologies to Tom Clancy