Brent Shepherd (he/him)
@shepcatzero
Down these mean skeets a man must go who is not himself mean, who is neither tarnished nor afraid.
The detective novel I happened to start reading just this morning, with a timely shout-out to Robert Pattinson’s character in THE ODYSSEY.
Anyway, my contribution to the zeitgeist. 5/5 #HATM #HighFidelity
To wit: I overslept a bit one morning, texted my supervisor I was running behind but was on my way, and clocked in 17 minutes late. Even though I fully intended to make up those 17 minutes and work my full eight for the day, my supervisor had to adjust my time so it wouldn't be charged against me.
Elon doesn't seem to understand that I would trade him to a tribe of cannibals for a mere token. Shiny beads, a carved figurine, a boar's-tooth necklace — whatever they felt was fair.
Centennial: "We made it 100 years. That's great!" Bicentennial: "We made it 200 years. That's fantastic!" Semiquincentennial: "We made it halfway to 500 years. This enterprise can still go pear-shaped at any time. Heads on swivels, everybody. Stay frosty."
If the crowd size at this celebration isn't the thing that makes It Happen, some country's gonna get bombed Sunday morning.
I love that Messi has this kind of irked expression now, like, "Don't they know who I am?" #ARGvsCPV #FIFAWorldCup
Not for nothing, if Bob's Big Boy didn't swing some kind of sponsorship deal with the Croatian national team, it's a missed opportunity. #PORvsCRO #FIFAWorldCup
In honor of his 100th birthday, a loose retelling of my favorite Mel Brooks story:
I have no indelible memories of Portugal's superstar Cristiano Ronaldo in action, so whenever I see him in close-up, I see the infamous bust sculpted in his honor, as though his actual movie star–handsome face is just a palimpsest on thin tracing paper over this ridiculous thing my mind can't unsee.
Today I stumbled across the album cover for jazz trumpeter Freddie Hubbard's 1962 Blue Note release HUB-TONES, and it is almost certainly the inspiration for the one-sheet of one of my favorite movies, Steven Soderbergh's 1999 crime-and-revenge drama THE LIMEY.
Post one (1) photo of a painting that you took with your very own hands. The photo, that is, not the painting. "Hollywood" (1938) by Thomas Hart Benton, whose life intersects with my own in a number of circumstantial but interesting ways.
Joe Rogan looks like he’s doing Violet Beauregarde cosplay. He looks like he was cast as Kingpin in a 5/8-scale version of Marvel’s DAREDEVIL. He looks like he swells up as a defense against predators. He looks like the last thing pie sees. He looks like a globe waiting to have continents added.
New, from the middle-aged minds that brought you “Hey, That’s a Pretty Good Box,” it’s “Wait — That Contact Lens Fluid Squeeze Bottle Has Some Untapped Potential.”
Seizing this rare opportunity to repurpose my MLB rain delay meme. #KennedyCenter
Honestly, the #Royals are just ambient sound in my apartment while I do other things now. I don't even know what we're doing here anymore. #KCvsTEX #FountainsOff
Repost with your first crush. I was far too young to understand the concept of a crush, but seeing Peggy Lipton on THE MOD SQUAD was likely the first time it occurred to me that girls were pretty and I should dedicate myself to further investigation of this new information.
You could give 1,000 monkeys with typewriters 1,000 years, and they'd crack Shakespeare before any one of them tapped out the phrase "The Codfish Hollow show is sold out."
I’m fairly certain the author meant “exclamation.” #ShepcatEditsEverything
Fight me, you smooth-brained racist imbeciles. I’ll launch a thousand ships for her RIGHT NOW.
Not gonna lie. For a split-second I thought some visionary had finally invented the gravy sink.
The mere fact of the slush fund in itself is corruption, plain and simple. The specificity of $1.776 billion is the "fuck you." It's these assholes regarding the J6 assholes as patriots and all of them telling the American people to go fuck ourselves.
Portrait of a Rapidly Decaying Man Staying Alive Only So He Can Make Life Miserable for Others
Earlier this week one of our favorite people mentioned she had satisfied a craving for biscuits and gravy by whipping up a batch for her birthday breakfast, and the SKL staff responded in Pavlovian fashion. Shepcat Kitchen Laboratories: Breakfast Will Be the Death of Us