Shrub Dryad

@shrubdryad

Enthusiast, writer/artist/musician, mom, occasional YouTuber and streamer. she/her Wellbeing for all!

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Shrub Dryad@shrubdryad· 12d

A cartoon cat looks in a window and says, "Yay... Ha Ha Ha... YAY!"

Shrub Dryad@shrubdryad· Jul 9

The Cadaver Tomb of René de Chalon, in which he offers his heart to God.

A magnificent and gruesome 16th-century marble sculpture of a half-decayed, skeletal corpse holding up its heart (sort of a cute little Valentine thing) toward the heavens, pressing its other hand to its chest.

Shrub Dryad@shrubdryad· Jun 26

Without downloading new pics, what's it like dating you?

An illustration from George Vasey's Victorian-era treatise The Philosophy of Laughter and Smiling. It's an intentionally unflattering depiction of a toothy woman indecently displaying mild amusement, with the caption "The Giggling Laugh, excited by Boisterous Fun and Nonsense."

(The ugly picture isn't a dig at myself or anything, I just love fun and nonsense, which includes this absolutely wild anti-laughter book, let me tell you more about it, this is what it's like to date me or be friends with me)

Shrub Dryad@shrubdryad· Jun 24

This joke happened on a call with @indeeddistract.bsky.social a few months ago and detonated my brain. We present it to you now for #makeaterriblecomicday2026 (Apologies to @xkcd.com)

A style pastiche of xkcd, but uglier.

Panel one: Two stick figures are walking together. The first says, "My doctor says I need to see a neologist." The second says, "Don't you mean neurologist?"

Panel two: A doctor's office. The patient from earlier is sitting on an examining table. A figure in a big lab coat says, "This case requires aggressive trortment."

Shrub Dryad@shrubdryad· May 15

Shrub Dryad@shrubdryad· May 14

Your last saved meme is your moral philosophy. Sorry about it

Gowron (the Klingon with the crazy eyes) is screaming with satisfaction. There's VHS damage over the image. A caption says, "Everyone was harmed during the making of this video."

Shrub Dryad@shrubdryad· May 7

Shaenon is my favorite cartoonist. I hope she never learns which side the thumb goes on.

The text of the poem "Oranges" by Jean Little, with an illustration of some peeled oranges and orange slices:

I peel oranges neatly.
The sections come apart cleanly, perfectly in my hands.

When Emily peels an orange, she tears holes in it.
Juice squirts in all directions.

“Kate,” she says, “I don’t know how you do it!”

Emily is my best friend.
I hope she never learns how to peel oranges.

Shrub Dryad@shrubdryad· Apr 17

"What have you got against machines?" said Buck.

"They're slaves."

"Well, what the heck," said Buck. "I mean, they aren't people. They don't suffer. They don't mind working."

"No. But they compete with people."

"That's a pretty good thing, isn't it—considering what a sloppy job most people do of anything?"

"Anybody that competes with slaves becomes a slave," said Harrison thickly, and he left.

- Kurt Vonnegut, Player Piano

Shrub Dryad@shrubdryad· Mar 4

That type never have much to say about James 5, either.

1 Go to now, ye rich men, weep and howl for your miseries that shall come upon you.

2 Your riches are corrupted, and your garments are motheaten.

3 Your gold and silver is cankered; and the rust of them shall be a witness against you, and shall eat your flesh as it were fire. Ye have heaped treasure together for the last days.

4 Behold, the hire of the labourers who have reaped down your fields, which is of you kept back by fraud, crieth: and the cries of them which have reaped are entered into the ears of the Lord of sabaoth.

5 Ye have lived in pleasure on the earth, and been wanton; ye have nourished your hearts, as in a day of slaughter.

Shrub Dryad@shrubdryad· Jan 27

A comic panel, hastily edited so that the word MINKS barely covers the word DINOSAURS.

Spider-Man: You can rewrite DNA on the fly, and you're using it to turn people into [MINKS]? But with tech like that, you could cure cancer!

Sauron (not that one): But I don't want to cure cancer. I want to turn people into [MINKS].

Shrub Dryad@shrubdryad· Jan 27

Shrub Dryad@shrubdryad· Jan 20

My account is too little for this number to go very high, but I do like to blather.

Get to know me. 1 like = 1 answer.
1. Do you have any nicknames?
2. What is a compliment you've never forgotten?
3. Is there something you want to tell someone, but won't?
4. Do you believe in soulmates? Why or why not?
5. Biggest turn on?
6. What was your first job?
7. What was the last song you sang?
8. What is one of your most treasured memories?
9. What has overwhelmed you recently?
10. Someone gave you $100, what are you spending it on?
11. What makes you feel appreciated?
12. Do you have trust issues?
13. Best concert you've ever been to?
14. Do you care what other people think of you?
15. What are your main hobbies?
16. Describe your dream home.
17. What is your strongest held beliefs)?
18. If you could get on a plane tomorrow, where would you go?
19. What is your most attractive feature?
20. Do you believe in aliens?
21. Biggest turn off?
22. What has made you laugh the most lately?
23. Favorite animal?
24. What lyrics are currently stuck in your head?
25. Is there someone you wish you could forgive?
26. Name 3-5 ways to win your heart.
27. Favorite comfort show?
28. Name one thing that always makes you angry.
29. Favorite type of weather?
30. What are you currently looking forward to?

Shrub Dryad@shrubdryad· Jan 14

I'm going to make a physical version of this and put it in my house. (Credit to bitbang.social/@NanoRaptor/...)

A sign, in green, stating WELCOME with triangle and exclamation mark. Below is the text which reads as follows:

This place is a blessing and part of a system of blessings. Cherish it deeply!

Sending this blessing was meaningful to us. We considered ourselves a joyful community.

This place is a place of honor. Many cherished deeds are celebrated here. Everything valued thrives here.

What is here was nurturing and delightful to us. This blessing is a message of hope.

The hope is in a special location. It radiates outward from a center. The center of hope is here, of a unique shape and size, and beneath us. The hope is ever-present, in your time, as it was in ours.

The hope is for the spirit, and it can heal. The form of the hope is a flow of light. The hope is shared freely when you lovingly engage with this place physically.

This place is best embraced and cared for.

Shrub Dryad@shrubdryad· Dec 22

A woman meditating on the beach, with the text SERENITY INTENSIFIES

Shrub Dryad@shrubdryad· Dec 10

I'm very tired and my bff sent me this and I think it is funny.

Don Draper with his dialogue partially blacked out and overwritten, so now it says: I ___ think about you [as my friend :) ]

Shrub Dryad@shrubdryad· Nov 28

Shrub Dryad@shrubdryad· Nov 14

Here's a poem my friend wrote about masculinizing hormones.

Andar Wärje
New Home

Testosterone has made me softer than
I was before. Those days of holding in--
stopped breath, stuck voice, choked bone-stick, brittle-thin,
my reach an ever-tightening wingspan,
ribs locked, a dim self-hating prison, and
a Bluebeard's cave of murdered selves within.
Those nights, my racing heart like rats would spin
inside my hollow chest walls--how it ran!
Yet quiet now, its frantic claws gone still
as shafts of sunlight beat into its cage.
My breast unfurls like crocus buds part chill
soil after finger; soft, thick fur like sage-
brush pelts down hills to wide wet lakes that fill
with snow-melt. Old ice flows to a new age.

Shrub Dryad@shrubdryad· Oct 22

This poem by Akwaeke Emezi.

SELF-PORTRAIT AS AN ANGEL
Akwaeke Emezi

i will most certainly have wings of roaring flame
eleven of them, seven unstable faces, your worst
shame as my eyes, your darkest desire as
my sword, bloody and oh so beautiful
and i will finally look
like the terrible thing
i have always been

haven't you always
wanted power beyond
sense, haven't you asked for it
in your most sinful nights, sworn to pay
whatever the cost? i am not here to answer
or lend grace, perhaps you do not understand
how this actually works. i think
you should be very afraid.

Shrub Dryad@shrubdryad· Oct 12

If you see this QRP with a game that released the year you were born. Or don't, because that's personally identifiable information and maybe you're in a weird mood. Or maybe you're a thousand-year-old shrub vampire. Who's to say.

Reputedly mediocre Middle High German poet Diethelm Göli plays an early form of backgammon with a buddy in the Codex Manesse (14th c.)

His coat of arms appears to be "Gules, a lion checky sable and argent crowned Or." His crest is a demi-lion, the same.

Shrub Dryad@shrubdryad· Oct 2

It's time.

Frame one: A blonde teenager with long '90s hair and a leather jacket says, "This is Ice." Next to him, his buddy in a dumb hat makes a tough-guy face.

Frame two: Buddy has turned around, revealing the word "ICE" shaved into the back of his head. Blond kid is aggressively pointing at it.

Shrub Dryad@shrubdryad· Sep 18

Smash two movies together:

A movie theater marquee with "There Will Be Blood" on one side and "Definitely Maybe" on the other. The effect is as follows:

THERE WILL DEFINITELY
BE BLOOD MAYBE

Shrub Dryad@shrubdryad· Sep 18

Post a movie you like with a terrible Rotten Tomatoes score. This movie is so bad and so awesome.

A screenshot of the Rotten Tomatoes page for The Core, released 2003. It has a 39% Tomatometer score and a 34% Popcornmeter score. It also features this summary:

"Geophysicist Dr. Josh Keyes (Aaron Eckhart) discovers that an unknown force has caused the earth's inner core to stop rotating. With the planet's magnetic field rapidly deteriorating, our atmosphere literally starts to come apart at the seams with catastrophic consequences. To resolve the crisis, Keyes, along with a team of the world's most gifted scientists, travel into the earth's core. Their mission: detonate a device that will reactivate the core."

Shrub Dryad@shrubdryad· Sep 1

Post a random picture or else everything will go bad in September

Altered screenshot of a Craigslist post. The photo is of a big TV, unplugged, with a silly image of Serj Tankian faintly visible, grinning and shrugging. The post header says, "Samsung 50 inches 4k w chop suy guy burnt in". Below that it says "$150".

Shrub Dryad@shrubdryad· Aug 13

This is my friend Benjamin Sisko. My other friend Rob, a teacher and a hilarious weirdo whom I adore, needs help paying for Ben's healthcare (and his own). If you can contribute a couple bucks and/or share this link around, that would be so awesome. gofund.me/a485878e

A selfie. I'm a bespectacled redhead and I'm very happy about the tabby cat lazing on the sofa over my shoulder. He is showing Leg.

Shrub Dryad@shrubdryad· Jul 28

Convenient downloads, too.

A screenshot of a post by Jason (@nickmotown.bsky.social) from June 4, 2025, reading "Kudos to the bird that managed to shit an image of itself onto this bloke's car." Attached is a photo of a bird poop splatter on a car window, almost exactly shaped like a perching songbird.

Shrub Dryad@shrubdryad· Jun 30

The "toxic environment" meme from Glee, but the text has been altered, so now it's a woman looking sinister and saying, "I am going to create a feeling that is so okay"

Shrub Dryad@shrubdryad· Jun 28

Exploring my own house.

"Video games cause violence." Based on the last game you played, what are you getting arrested for?

Shrub Dryad@shrubdryad· Jun 28

Shrub Dryad@shrubdryad· Jun 19

I just clicked into Bluesky and I don't know what's going on yet but it looks like this and you are a gift.

A screenshot from Bluesky. It shows the top post of this thread, where Alexandra is talking about songs and poems. Then it has a "view full thread" link suggesting she talked for a while. Then it has a post from 40 minutes later where she's talking about sci fi, fantasy, and robots.

Shrub Dryad@shrubdryad· May 19

Take the openpsychometrics quiz and post the first four you know: openpsychometrics.org/tests/charac... Apparently I answered these questions in a state of Sidekick Energy. (Valentine Wiggin was below Beth and above Willow, but I don't associate her with the movie and probably neither do you.)