Mabel Slattery
@slatteroo
Cousin Jack of all trades, master of dungeons and medieval dick jokes. She/they.
My gran occasionally gives me mundane small things from her house - this turned out to be less mundane. We now know why my gran had a reputation of being wickedly good at poker when on holiday. Turns out she was wickedly good at cheating at the right moment.
NEW MEDIEVAL TATTOO ALERT! “Bees are the smallest of birds” I love my strange peanut son.
5 minutes later I came in rubbing my gums like I was in a police procedural going “it’s pure”, then showed him this and ran away again. Dinner was eventful.
I grew a perfect radish and I’ve never been prouder of myself. My masters might as well be useless; I can throw my teacher training away - I’ve hit my peak.
Teasel came back without her collar so the “emergency collar” has made a resurgence.
So I may not be the best at cake decorating and I may have forgotten to buy candles so my 15 year old stepdaughter had to settle for being 2, but I made coffee cake with caramel cream and apparently it tasted good so parenting success? She ate the whole thing herself over two days - legend.
Now, you’ll want to quote-post this: don’t. Use this instead to keep it all going:
So I had spare seeds. Red Pepper, Habanero, Carolina Reaper. So I planted them all in one seed tray. Then forgot where they were while I went to get labels. So welcome to capsicum roulette everyone! We won’t know til they fruit!
I made a divorce card because the recipient deserved to celebrate their freedom from years of abuse with style.
My stepdaughter handed this to me and said “I found you in Lego… don’t worry, you can change the face to make it more anxious.”
The King Pombear on a packet of pombears has no belly button but the crisps do. This suggests that the king is the original manufactured pombear and the crisps are his live-birthed young which we crunch on with abandon.
My hidden talent is getting new games to fit in my boyfriend’s boardgame collection without having to get rid of anything. Took me a couple of hours but I got (nearly) everything to fit!
This depressive episode has thankfully allowed for art. My new bullet journal is becoming slowly beautiful.
This is Teasel, in her “emergency collar” (the collar I put on her when I need cheering up).
30H and I’ve had the occasional person pull up my top and look for a bra label because they don’t believe me (joke’s on them, I wear Molke bras that don’t do standard sizing mwhahahahahaha) please take this photo for your research.
Oh yeah, I forgot to say that even though depression has been shit and my hands keep attempting not to work I still managed to finish my hot water bottle cover because, sometimes, even I have to admit that I rock.
Look, yesterday was shit for so many reasons which is why I feel the need to spread the joy I got when Teasel’s new collar came in the post:
My mental health is in the toilet and my lesson planning feels like wading through fly-laden treacle but I’m a pretty mess and that’s what counts.
It is almost tradition now that in January I make hot water bottle covers. I’m gonna have to start giving them as gifts at this rate cos I enjoy it a lot!
In contrast my latest project is simpler but still has a long way to go (literally!)
So look, I’m sure that most of them are bots or scams or whatever but this is the first time I’ve ever had a thousand people follow me for anything and I’m lightly gobsmacked. Here is a picture of the last time I was gobsmacked - being given a large amount of baklava.
From game cheese to real cheese as me and Doug finally had some proper time. Fromage was a fantastic board game and our cheeseboard was delicious.