thehoyden

@thehoyden

Fic writing and other fannish things. She/her, queer, millennial. BTS ARMY, OT7, Jimin bias. archiveofourown.org/users/thehoyden

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Bluesky

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thehoyden@thehoyden· 4d

Namjoon, certified nerd (affectionate): teaching Jimin how to play Pokemon Go, confessing that an Army beat his ass in a Pokemon battle before the show, implying that he's been walking 15K steps a day for Pokemon reasons, showing us his recent score of Pokemon cards (already in hard plastic cases)

Namjoon showing us his blurred out Pokemon cards in hard plastic cases. He is wearing a hat that says love, and a shirt that says Nietzsche

thehoyden@thehoyden· 9d

This was my first time seeing them all together, and both days were really wonderful. It was hot, and it did mist/drizzle a bit on D2, but I still had a great time, thanks to advice from other ARMY. As BTS said - even these difficulties become precious memories 💜

thehoyden@thehoyden· 9d

D2 Jimin had all of my favorite concert outfits of his, including urban witch and softest omega. I didn’t get any video of the multiple times he was rolling around on the stage, but I did get this! (Tw: flashing lights)

thehoyden@thehoyden· 9d

Jimin prowling the stage at D1 soundcheck, before giving a cute little bow!

thehoyden@thehoyden· 9d

Namjoon blamed his Pikachu hat on his stylist, like OKAY, but you still decided to go out with it on!!! Also: I love Namjoon breaking into a gigglefit, courtesy of Tae and JK

thehoyden@thehoyden· Feb 14

❤️ what is your love song? 🎤 🔗 shop.bts-official.us/pages/whatis...

Hoyden's love song is Mikrokosmos by BTS

thehoyden@thehoyden· Jan 25

Did the blackberries fall to the bottom, as I was warned? Yes. Did I skip the step about the citrus cyrup? Yes. Did I ignore the instructions to wait until completely cooled? Yes. Do I have any regrets? Absolutely zero.

A loaf of blackberry yogurt cake, with two slices on a plate.

thehoyden@thehoyden· Aug 31

For Reasons, I am currently neck deep in reading translations of Chinese poetry involving orioles. I had a very nice time reading a poem by Du Fu, and then burst out laughing when, after the explanatory text, the website informed me I could read this banger (also by Du Fu):

Many People Come to Visit and Bring Wine After I Fell Off My Horse, Drunk

thehoyden@thehoyden· Aug 18

Sneak peek at the beginning of my new #untamed fic - this one is #xiyao and #nieyao (and maybe 3zun?). It's a xxxHOLiC AU - you don't need to know anything about the canon, just know that it involves a wish shop. The vibes are definitely creepy, but not outright horror, because I'm delicate. Enjoy!

Meng Yao noticed the shop on his way back from the hospital.

His steps slowed and he came to a stop just outside. Had it always been there? Had he just never paid it any attention before?

He didn't think so. He didn't trust a lot, but he did trust his memory. He'd never seen the shop before, despite passing down this street at least once a day for the last three months.

It was, he noticed, open. He couldn't tell what was for sale, but something was. There were shadows in the windows, and he had the unnerving feeling that they were staring at him.

He wasn't sure what made him go up to the door. He didn't have any money. All his money from his part time jobs went toward his mom's medical expenses. He'd given up the lease on their apartment two months ago, and had started showering at the company gym, and catching what sleep he could at an out of the way conference room when he wasn't sleeping on a friend or an auntie's floor.

Nie Mingjue was going to catch him eventually, though, and then there would be hell to pay.

Just then, the door opened.

Meng Yao couldn't quite see inside, but he grabbed his keys in his bag like his mother taught him, so they could be used as a means of self-defense if needed, and crossed the threshold.

The shadows followed him down the hallway. The hallway itself felt like it shifted and warped around him, and he heard a few voices behind closed, darkened doors.

Jin Guangyao, he realized they were whispering.

The name sent a chill down his spine, even though it wasn't his. The only thing he could do was keep moving to the doors at the end, with light shining around the edges and through the papered lattices.

These doors, too, opened for him.

Sprawled on a daybed inside was a man in elaborate hanfu with long hair, a fan hiding everything but his eyes.

"There you are," he said lightly. His voice was deeper than Meng Yao had guessed, but somehow strangely familiar.

"I'm sorry," Meng Yao said reflexively. "Do you know me?"

"Mm. Maybe. Who can say, really," he said, his eyes curving up a bit, just over the edge of his open fan. "But you can only be Meng Yao."

Meng Yao's hand tightened around his keys in his bag. "You have the advantage of me," he said. "May I ask what your name is?"

"I doubt you'll need it," he said. "And I can't imagine you've lost any of your passion for efficiency. If you're here, Meng Yao, it's because you have a wish."

thehoyden@thehoyden· Aug 8

Finally, finally: here is the last chapter of ditchfic (aka soulbond of convenience)! Thank you to everyone who has been reading along; for those of you who have been waiting for this to be complete before reading, please enjoy! archiveofourown.org/works/662249... #xiyao #3zun #untamed #mdzs

Marrying Efficiency to Ideals
thehoyden
Chapter 10
Summary:
Meng Yao was not afraid of hard work.

thehoyden@thehoyden· Jul 25

In today's chapter of ditchfic (aka soulbond of convenience): 3zun? 3zun!!! 💖 Enjoy! archiveofourown.org/works/662249... #xiyao #3zun #untamed #mdzs #jinguangyao #lanxichen #niemingjue

Marrying Efficiency to Ideals
thehoyden
Chapter 8
Summary:
"You really are a Nie at heart, I've always thought."

thehoyden@thehoyden· Jul 18

In today's chapter of ditchfic (aka soulbond of convenience): okay it's happening.gif I'm really excited to post this one - hope you enjoy! archiveofourown.org/works/662249... #xiyao #3zun #untamed #mdzs #jinguangyao #lanxichen #niemingjue

Marrying Efficiency to Ideals
thehoyden
Chapter 7
Summary:
Lan Xichen said, "Would my wife like to know a secret?"

"My husband appears to want to tell me," Meng Yao said, barely suppressing a smile.

thehoyden@thehoyden· Jul 11

In today's chapter of ditchfic (aka soulbond of convenience): a long-expected party arrives. Enjoy! archiveofourown.org/works/662249... #xiyao #3zun #untamed #mdzs #jinguangyao #lanxichen #niemingjue

Marrying Efficiency to Ideals
thehoyden
Chapter 6
Summary:
Meng Yao did promise to bring his difficulties to Lan Xichen, and this definitely qualified, which meant that he probably should talk about it. Which, in retrospect, was a terrible promise; Meng Yao liked it much better when he just fixed both of their problems and only told Lan Xichen when it was done.

thehoyden@thehoyden· Jul 4

In today's chapter of ditchfic (aka soulbond of convenience), you will be shocked--SHOCKED--to hear that Meng Yao schemes, and some of those schemes bear unintended fruit. Enjoy! archiveofourown.org/works/662249... #xiyao #3zun #untamed #mdzs #jinguangyao #lanxichen #niemingjue

Marrying Efficiency to Ideals by thehoyden
Chapter 5
Summary:
"A-Sang," Meng Yao said slowly. The diminutive felt strange in his mouth, but not bad. "I wonder if you might be willing to do me a favor."

"Oh, Yao-ge," Nie Huaisang said, his tone sly. "Tell me everything."

thehoyden@thehoyden· Jun 27

Posting today's chapter of ditchfic (aka soulbond of convenience) a few hours early! A lot happens in this chapter, and maaaybe this fic finally earns its rating. Enjoy! archiveofourown.org/works/662249... #xiyao #3zun #untamed #mdzs #jinguangyao #lanxichen #niemingjue

Marrying Efficiency to Ideals by the Hoyden
Chapter 4
Summary:
"Do you want to do this?" Lan Xichen asked, sounding merely curious.

"Yes," Meng Yao said impatiently. "For efficiency, gege, weren't you listening?"

thehoyden@thehoyden· Jun 20

In today's chapter of ditchfic, aka soulbond of convenience: Lan Xichen and Meng Yao arrive in Qinghe and we finally get this 3zun party started. Enjoy! archiveofourown.org/works/662249... #xiyao #3zun #untamed #mdzs #jinguangyao #lanxichen #niemingjue

Marrying Efficiency to Ideals by thehoyden, Chapter 3
Summary: Yesterday had been a very long day, and Lan Xichen had kissed him, and he was no longer in terrible pain, and crucially: Lan Xichen had kissed him.

(Or: Meng Yao and Lan Xichen arrive in Qinghe.)

thehoyden@thehoyden· Jun 13

Chapter 2 of Marrying Efficiency to Ideals is up! Thank you so much for all your lovely comments on the first chapter; I hope you'll enjoy this one as well! archiveofourown.org/works/662249... #xiyao #3zun #untamed #mdzs #jinguangyao #lanxichen #niemingjue

Chapter 2
Summary
Meng Yao tugged at Lan Xichen's robes here and there, and then sighed. "The robes are plain enough, but my husband is too handsome." He stepped back to assess the situation. "Perhaps a hat," he mused.

"A hat?"

"My mother always said a proper gentleman wears one," Meng Yao said.

thehoyden@thehoyden· Jun 6

Finally, FINALLY: here's the first chapter of ditchfic, aka soulbond of convenience. I'm so happy to finally be able to start sharing this--hope you enjoy! archiveofourown.org/works/66224968 #xiyao #3zun #untamed #mdzs

Marrying Efficiency to Ideals
by thehoyden
Summary:
It turned out that all Meng Yao had to do to turn his fortunes in life around was find a beautiful man in a ditch, save his life by wagering his own cultivation, and allow everyone to assume they were legitimately married.

(or: Meng Yao vs every single marriage-related trope: FIGHT.)

thehoyden@thehoyden· Mar 5

For WIP Wednesday, another snippet from my #xiyao fic, formerly known as ditch fic, but perhaps more accurately described as “soulmates of convenience” fic 👀 #untamed #mdzs #LanXichen #JinGuangyao

He woke some time in the deep night, the moonlight streaming in the window.

Lan Xichen was still lying on his back, but his head was turned on the pillow to face Meng Yao, and his eyes were open. He was pale, like a spirit or a ghost, and Meng Yao was nearly sure he was dreaming at that moment. “Zewu-jun?” he breathed out.

“Meng Yao,” Lan Xichen said, just as hushed, his expression wondering.

Meng Yao wasn’t sure anyone had ever said his name like that, like he was some unexpected boon. It made his breath catch.

“Where are we?” Lan Xichen asked. He didn’t move his gaze away from Meng Yao.

“Safe,” Meng Yao said. “Well. Safe as we can be, for right now.”

thehoyden@thehoyden· Feb 14

I actually got into MDZS and BTS at the same time in late 2022, and I started writing a #xiyao fic around that time with the help of @ataratah.bsky.social. About 10K in, I got stuck. @twsomething.bsky.social got me unstuck a few days ago, so I'm back at it! Here's a snippet from beginning:

Meng Yao found the love of his life in a literal ditch.

He didn’t actually know that Lan Xichen would be any such thing at that point, of course, and in fact, when he gingerly picked his way down off the road and approached the body crumpled in a heap on the ground, he braced himself to turn over a corpse. And then rob it, because he had recently been thrown down several flights of stairs and he was in desperate need of both food and medicine.

From up close, he saw that it wasn’t just any corpse; there was the familiar ribbon across the temple, and that was Lan clan embroidery on the torn and dirty robes. Lan Xichen would forgive him, he thought. What use did a dead Lan disciple have for money?

Then he realized the man was still breathing. And when he gently turned him over, he realized it was Lan Xichen, whose face was pale and bloodied and still made his stupid heart flutter.

He found qiankun pouches stored in his sleeves, and they all appeared to be full of books, and Meng Yao wanted to howl in hysterical laughter. He was in a ditch with the Lan sect leader, and they had no money and no food, just ancient cultivation texts.

“Alright, gege,” he dared to say to Lan Xichen’s unconscious body. “I’m going to—figure something out. Don’t worry.”

Lan Xichen didn’t stir, but then Meng Yao saw a cart approach them on the road, and there was really nothing for it, then, but to ask the traveling merchant to please, please, allow his poor injured husband to ride in the back of the cart to the next town.

He got a long look, but eventually the man sighed. “You need help getting him up? You’re just a little thing.”

Meng Yao gave him his nicest, most grateful smile, and didn’t take offense. He was a little thing, and it made people underestimate him.

thehoyden@thehoyden· Jan 20

New prompt fic is up! In which Taehyung dreams of the future, just a little. - #Vmin, #Vminkook - AU where Taehyung has prophetic dreams - Canon compliant-ish - A happy ending (as per my usual) archiveofourown.org/works/62373859 #fic #bts

Spreading Trembling Wings by thehoyden
Summary: Taehyung dreamed of the future, sometimes.

Just a little bit—nothing that would show up on an exam. They didn’t let precognitives be idols, after all. Those children were swept into the government, as soon as they were found.

But he dreamed about the boy from Busan. Just enough—his voice, murmuring. His hand, held in Taehyung’s.

It could mean anything, but even then, Taehyung knew: Jimin was important.

thehoyden@thehoyden· Jan 5

Completely unrelated to Taehyung’s decision to become an absolute unit, I picked back up a #vmin WIP that had been lingering for months, partially due to me wavering over whether to keep it vmin or make it vminkook. I think we’re going to leave the door open for vminkook - here’s a sneak peek!

Taehyung dreamed of the future, sometimes.

Just a little bit--nothing that would show up on an exam. They didn’t let precognitives be idols, after all. Those children were swept into the government, as soon as they were found.

But he dreamed about the boy from Busan. Just enough—his voice, murmuring. His hand, held in Taehyung’s.

It could mean anything, but even then, Taehyung knew: Jimin was important.

thehoyden@thehoyden· Jan 5

My favorite part of their last live is Jimin losing the battle with his intrusive thoughts and just feeling Taehyung up on camera. Extensively. I can only imagine how he's going to react now that Taehyung's biceps are the size of tree trunks. (video original link: x.com/vminnightsky...)

thehoyden@thehoyden· Jan 1

The Finch app has really figured out the best motivator for accomplishing your self-care goals: triggering one’s innate desire to catch rare Pokémon

A cute drawing of a little caribou with the text, Keep up with your January goals to catch Caramel, the rare micropet!

thehoyden@thehoyden· Dec 7

Weird how taking a vacation and then also handing some work off results in me writing for the first time in months. It’s almost like…stress inhibits creativity??? Anyway, please enjoy a sneak peek at my #Jikook spy AU, very much inspired by Jimin talking in Jungkook’s ear during AYS!

One day, Jungkook's handler just disappeared.

"Reassigned," Yoongi said with a clipped voice. Jungkook was allowed to call him by his given name in private. Well, allowed was maybe not quite right. Rather, that Yoongi permitted him to get away with it, because he was the maknae of all of the agents, even now.

Jungkook couldn't say that he was heartbroken by the news. His handler had been much older, and complained often that Jungkook was easily distracted, and didn't listen. Also, sometimes? He was just flat out mean, which Jungkook wished didn't bother him as much as it did.

"Do I have a new handler assigned yet?" Jungkook asked. He had a mission lined up, and there wasn't a lot of wiggle room in the timing.

Yoongi nodded shortly, and led the way out to the mission room.

There was someone new standing at his old handler's station. Shorter than Jungkook, about Yoongi's height. Blonde hair, worn a little longer than the other handlers--longer than Agent V, even. His suit was not expensive but it was very well tailored. He was wearing small silver hoops in his ears. Everything about it said that it was his first day in a new job, and he was trying to make a good impression.

Yoongi led Jungkook over to him, and then said gruffly, "Agent JK, this is your new handler, Muse."

Muse offered his hand to shake, and it felt so small in Jungkook's.

thehoyden@thehoyden· Dec 2

This 90s office cosplay is sending me. Imagine deciding this is your entire visual theme for an album version. I do not wish to discuss the length of time I looked at that computer and tried to remember when I had access to one with all three of those inputs. #jin #bts

Jin of BTS in a white collared shirt and red pullover and some pants that someone imagined could be office appropriate. He is sitting on the floor in front of a desk with a computer of vaguely early 90s provenance.

thehoyden@thehoyden· Dec 2

I’m opening up my Happy albums, and all I have to say is: KIM SEOKJIN, how DARE you be so handsome that not even a WIG WITH A MULLET appreciably detracts from your overall level of handsomeness? #jin #bts

Jin of BTS, wearing a white shirt and apron, holding a coffee cup with one hand, being inexplicably handsome while sporting a brown wig with a mullet, a real choice that the art director of his album, and presumably Jim himself, signed off on

thehoyden@thehoyden· Oct 14

New prompt challenge fic is up! In which Jimin thinks he knows exactly what Jin wants to give him. archiveofourown.org/works/59758126 #jimin #jin #jinmin #fic

Hyung Card by thehoyden

Summary: "You don't have to go to strangers if you're just looking to scratch an itch. Hyung can give you a hand," Seokjin said.

"Um," Jimin said, because Seokjin was supportive of him exploring his attraction to men but had never really indicated that he himself had any particular inclination in that direction. "I didn't think you—you know."

"What, you think my hand only works on my own dick?" Seokjin said, with a touch of amused exasperation. "It's not complicated, Jimin-ah. If you decide you want it, you let hyung know."

(Or: Jimin thinks he knows exactly what his hyung is happy to give him.)

Rating:
Explicit
Archive Warning:
No Archive Warnings Apply
Category:
M/M
Fandom:
방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Relationship:
Kim Seokjin | Jin/Park Jimin
Characters:
Park Jimin (BTS)Kim Seokjin | JinBangtan Boys | BTS Ensemble
Additional Tags:
background yoonjinmin, mild exhibitionism, Hyung Kink, First Time, Canon Compliant, Soulmates Kim Taehyung | V & Park Jimin
Language:English

thehoyden@thehoyden· Aug 6

Okay yes obviously I understand one’s attention being drawn to Jimin’s lips here, but: is that a new ear piercing? Light reflecting weirdly off a piece of hair? A secret third option??? #Jimin #BTS

thehoyden@thehoyden· Aug 4

A floof taking an afternoon nap (yes my duvet is purple for important BTS reasons)