don’t wanna be anything where i don’t know when to stop

wife: how’s the diet going me: [entering a lunch consisting solely of jalapeño cheetos into my fitness tracker while mcdonald’s names a sandwich after me] it’s been worse

also the phillies should change their mascot to a goose cause wtf is this

had to make room you see

glad i got to toss this one

tbt the saddest picture i ever took

couldn’t sleep so i read facebook felt like an explorer falling off the edge of the world

waiting for group chats so i can do this bit again

u can tell this is a canadian article the american mind can not comprehend the phrase “leftover” hot dog

this the kind of shit you like you sick son of a bitch

great, now bluesky is reading my mind

feel like the art but make is sports guy rn

i gotta start keeping my phone further away from me in the middle of the night

fitness watch recorded today’s 40 minute workout as “bicycling, leisure”

he knows what he did

have u ever truly felt seen

i saw will hardy say this about him and it’s stuck in my mind since

fascinating when things line up as such

not sure where i was going with this one

yes linkedin *removes blade from sheath* never more so

posted this picture the day of every mgb show i’ve gone to since 2011ish and not gonna stop now

the only thing i’ve ever done in my life

visual aid for some of our younger friends curious about implementability

it finally hit me who phil reminds me of sometimes

new pfp just dropped

“a drive into deep left field by castellanos”